How to Write a Eulogy for Your Military Comrade - Eulogy Examples & Tips

This is for the person who stood with you in the worst of it. Losing a comrade in arms feels like part of you is missing. You want to say something honest and true. You also want to honor the uniform and the people who matter to the fallen. This guide gives you a clear structure, real examples you can adapt, and practical delivery tips so your words land the way you intend them to.

Everything here is written for people who are pressed for time, heavy with grief, and want to get it right. You will find a straightforward eulogy template, variations for rank and role, examples for different circumstances, and notes on military funeral protocol. We explain all acronyms and terms so nothing is left in shorthand. Read what you need to, then copy one of the templates and make it yours.

Before You Begin: Who Are You Writing For

Think about the audience. The room might include family members, unit members, older veterans, and civilians who loved the person. Your eulogy needs to hold space for private grief and public honor. Ask yourself three quick questions before you write a single line.

• Who is the primary audience? Family or unit? Pick one and write to them first.
• What memory will help most people remember this person? Pick one or two clear images.
• What tone feels right? Formal respect, blunt truth, or warm and funny? Pick the tone and stay steady.

Core Principles for a Military Eulogy

• Keep it human Speak about who they were, not just what they did. Military service matters. Personality matters more to listeners.
• Be specific Small details make a life vivid. Name a joke, an object, a routine, or a detail from deployment.
• Honor integrity If you tell a tough truth, pair it with a tribute to the comrade ship and service.
• Be concise Aim for eight to twelve minutes for a main speaker at a military funeral unless asked to speak shorter or longer.
• Offer one call to action Encourage honor through memory. Ask listeners to share a story with the family, support a veteran charity, or simply keep a memory alive.

How to Structure the Eulogy

A reliable structure keeps your thoughts breathing and guides your listener. Use this step by step format and you will have a speech that feels complete without wandering.

1. One line that states who they were

Start with a clear line that names the person and anchors the talk. This is not a recap of service. This is who they were to you. Examples include names and roles like "Sergeant Marcus Lee was the guy who fixed radios and fixed morale" or "Captain Ana Martinez loved coffee more than paperwork and she saved the unit's sense of humor."

2. Two quick facts about their service

Give context. Include rank, unit, notable deployments, awards or years served. Keep this tight and factual. If you use acronyms explain them. For example explain PTSD as post traumatic stress disorder and explain the VA as the Department of Veterans Affairs. People need clarity when they hear military shorthand.

3. One or two concrete memories

Tell a short story with sensory details. Show, do not lecture. The best eulogies let listeners see a small movie. A memory of a late night laugh, a moment of courage under pressure, or a ritual like cleaning gear while humming a song will stick.

4. What they taught you and the unit

Say what you learned from them. This ties the memory to an emotional truth. It can be practical like "he taught me how to patch a gas mask in under two minutes" or moral like "she taught us how to stand when the easy choice was to fold."

5. Their legacy

Explain how they live on. This can be through family, a cause, a tradition, or a nickname the unit keeps using. Be concrete. Names are better than abstract phrases like hero or icon.

6. Closing line that calls to memory

End with a brief, memorable line that invites others to remember. Keep it short and repeatable. For example "Remember Marcus when you fix something for someone" or "When you drink bad coffee, make it Ana's in your head and laugh."

Practical Writing Tips

• Write first, edit later Draft the raw memories without judgment. You can prune the tough bits in editing.
• Use plain words Avoid jargon or purple prose. Authenticity matters more than grandeur.
• Time yourself Read out loud and time it. Cut extras if you go long.
• Get consent for private details If your memory is deeply personal to the family, check with them before including it.
• Prepare a printed copy Have a readable font and bold the first sentence of each paragraph so you can find your place if tears come.

Language and Tone Examples

You have three tonal choices and none are wrong. Pick one and be steady.

Respectful and formal

Best for ceremonies with high rank, honors, or families who prefer official tone.

Warm and conversational

Best for units and families who want the person to be remembered as they were day to day.

Honest and slightly irreverent

Use this only if the family likes it. Many soldiers lived with dark humor and blunt talk. That humor can be an honest tribute when used gently.

Eulogy Templates You Can Steal

Below are ready made templates for different relationships and roles. Replace bracketed text with your details. Keep the structure and tone. These are designed to be adaptable and quick to personalize.

Template A: For a Best Buddy in the Squad

Start: [Name] was the friend who listened when the radio died and when the world felt loud. He was a [rank] in [unit] and he served for [years].

Service facts: He deployed to [location] with [operation if relevant]. He earned [awards if any]. To the family that is here today, know he talked about you in ways that made us laugh and cry.

Memory: The night before our first convoy he taught me how to fix a flat tire in the dark. We used a flashlight that smelled like coffee. When the convoy shook, [Name] patted my shoulder and said "We got this" like it was a promise more than a plan. That was him.

Lesson: He taught the team to hold steady and to check on the least visible person in the room. If things got ugly, he checked the rifle and checked your ego so we could keep the mission and each other.

Legacy: We will keep his nickname [nickname] alive in our mess hall and in our callsign. Every time someone hustles to help, we will say his name and mean it.

Closer: [Name], you left a hole and a map. We will follow it. Until we see you again, we will carry your laugh forward.

Template B: For a Leader or Officer

Start: Captain [Name] led with a plain spine and a complicated heart. He cared for the mission and for every person under his command.

Service facts: Captain [Name] served in [unit] for [years] and deployed to [locations]. He received [award names].

Memory: In a chow hall argument about policy, he put down his tray, listened to everyone, and then ordered pizza. He said leadership is about being loud enough for the quiet to speak. That is leadership in action.

Lesson: He taught us that orders have faces and that the right call is not the easy one. He expected accountability and gave the support that made people reach higher than they thought possible.

Legacy: His doctrine lives in the way our unit prepares and in the mentorship program he started. We will honor him by mentoring the next person the way he mentored us.

Closer: Captain [Name], your compass still points out. We will follow it until we cross paths again.

Template C: For a Medic or Corpsman

Start: [Name] saved lives and made us feel like we mattered. She was a corpsman with hands that fixed more than bleeding.

Service facts: She served at [base or ship] and deployed to [location]. The unit counted on her. Families counted on her too.

Memory: I remember the night we were pinned down. She crawled through mud with a radio and a grin. She made jokes to keep us moving while she wrapped wounds like nothing else mattered. That calm became our anchor.

Lesson: She taught us how to be human in the middle of crisis. She showed us that courage looks like kindness when you are exhausted.

Legacy: There will be soldiers alive because of her. Those lives are her ongoing story. The way we check on each other will carry her forward.

Closer: [Name], thank you for patching us up and for teaching us how to keep going. We will keep your light burning in the first aid kit and the last text of the night.

Examples of Full Eulogies You Can Use or Adapt

These examples are longer and meant to be directly adaptable. Edit names and details and read them aloud before the funeral.

Example 1: Squad Buddy, Warm and Direct Voice

Sergeant Dylan Park was the person you wanted on your six. He hated morning formations and loved late night card games. He served for ten years in the 2nd Infantry and deployed twice. When he talked about his sister Sarah he softened like sunlight.

One night in Kandahar we were out on a foot patrol when the engine of a nearby truck blew. The patrol stopped. Dylan walked over, put his hand on the truck, and said "Let us be useful here." He spent an hour disassembling the carburetor with a pocketknife and some chewing gum. He did not fix the truck perfectly. The truck ran well enough to get us home. That night he taught me how to improvise and how to laugh when things go wrong.

Dylan taught the unit to value practicality and to show up for small things. He was the person who would make you tea at two in the morning and then help you write a letter home when you needed it. His legacy is in the quiet rituals he started. At every deployment we will find someone humming his song. When someone fixes something with nothing, we will call it a Dylan fix and we will smile through the pain.

To Sarah and to the rest of his family, know he loved you the way only someone who has walked a long road can love. He kept your photos under his plate. He bragged about you in ways that embarrassed him. He was proud to be your brother. I am proud to have stood with him. Remember Dylan when you see a dented truck that somehow moves. Remember his laugh and pass it on.

Example 2: Officer, Formal but Personal

Major Elena Ruiz was both demanding and fair. She served as a logistics officer for the 82nd for sixteen years and she deployed to support humanitarian missions in addition to combat tours. The family knows she loved gardening and that she wrote postcards to her nephews every Sunday.

During a resupply, a convoy lost a pallet of medical gear. Elena did not wait. She organized a reroute, negotiated with commanders, and got supplies where they needed to be. She also stayed to comfort the youngest medic who was shaking. She balanced strategy and human care in a way few officers do.

She taught us to plan with empathy. Her legacy is a logistics program that saves time and lives. We will keep her lessons alive by mentoring the people she trained and continuing the small rituals she insisted on. To her spouse and children, know she would tell you to get mad, grieve, and then make coffee, because work and love continue. We will keep her postcards and her schedule. We will read them and remember how she showed up for every detail.

Military Funeral Protocol Basics

Knowing the basics helps you shape remarks and respect traditions. Below are common elements. If the family has specific instructions or a chaplain, follow those first.

• Military honors A funeral with military honors usually includes the folding and presentation of the flag, a rifle volley, and Taps. The honors depend on rank and circumstances.
• Flag protocol The flag is presented to the next of kin. Typically the presenter says a brief line of honor such as "On behalf of the President" or another formal phrase. Do not touch the flag unless invited.
• Uniforms If you are in uniform and authorized to attend in uniform, follow dress regulations. If you are a civilian, dress respectful and avoid loud patterns.
• Order of service The family often sets the order. Some funerals start with prayer then eulogy, others intersperse music and readings. Ask the funeral director or chaplain for the flow before you prepare remarks.
• Acknowledging casualties If the comrade died in combat, the family may want recognition of the sacrifice. Word this with sensitivity and avoid political commentary.

How to Deliver the Eulogy

• Practice out loud Read the full speech aloud at least three times. Speaking with emotion is different than writing.
• Mark your copy Bold the first sentence of each paragraph and add a short pause marker between paragraphs so you can breathe.
• Bring water A small bottle helps if you get choked up.
• Use a microphone Speak close and slowly into the mic. Short pauses emphasize points.
• Be honest about emotion It is okay to cry. Pause if you need to. The room will feel more human if you are real.
• Have a backup Give a copy to the chaplain or the funeral director. If you cannot finish, someone else can read the remaining lines.

What to Avoid Saying

• Avoid battling political arguments about the cause of death. This is not the forum unless the family asks.
• Avoid excessive military pride that eclipses personal memory. Rank matters. Personality matters more.
• Avoid speculation about circumstances of death. Stick to confirmed facts or say you do not know.
• Avoid long lists of awards without context. Explain briefly what an award means rather than naming many without explanation.

Explaining Military Terms and Acronyms

We will list common acronyms and terms and explain them so you do not have to guess. Use these in your speech only if necessary and always explain them for civilian listeners.

• VA This stands for the Department of Veterans Affairs. It is the government agency that handles veteran benefits and health care.
• PTSD This stands for post traumatic stress disorder. It is a mental health condition that can follow exposure to traumatic events. Use the full phrase at least once when you speak and explain briefly.
• KIA This stands for killed in action. It means the service member died while engaged in combat. Use this only if confirmed and appropriate.
• MIA This stands for missing in action. It means a service member is unaccounted for. Again, use with care and only when factual.
• FOB This stands for forward operating base. It is a military base in an area of operations.
• OEF Operation Enduring Freedom. This was the name of the U S campaign mostly associated with Afghanistan. Explain the location and time for civilians.
• OIF Operation Iraqi Freedom. This is the name of the main campaign associated with Iraq. Provide context rather than assuming everyone knows the initials.
• Purple Heart A medal awarded to those wounded or killed in action. If you mention it, say what it represents rather than assuming the audience knows.
• Corpsman A medic attached to a Navy or Marine unit. If you mention a corpsman, explain their role like a field medic who treats wounds and stabilizes casualties in combat.

Handling Sensitive Details and Family Wishes

Always check with the family before you include sensitive details. This includes medical info, cause of death, and intimate stories. If a family asks you to keep something private, honor it. If the family asks for honesty about a difficult struggle like suicide or substance use, ask how they want the topic framed and follow their lead.

When the Loss Is Complex

Some military deaths are complex. They can include long term injuries, suicide, or trauma related to service. If you are addressing any of these, keep these rules in mind.

• Use factual language Avoid euphemisms that obscure the truth. For example say "he died by suicide" rather than "he lost his battle" unless the family prefers a different phrasing.
• Offer resources If you bring up mental health, provide resources like the Veterans Crisis Line. The number is often well meaning when shared. Mention the phone number or text option and brief context.
• Honor the life first If the death was complicated, lead with lived memories then acknowledge the complexity. This helps listeners honor and understand at the same time.

Practical Checklist for the Day

• Confirm the order of service with the chaplain or funeral director.
• Bring a printed copy of your eulogy. Include an extra copy for the family.
• Wear comfortable shoes. You may stand for a long time.
• Prepare an opening line and a one line closing in case you need to shorten the speech spontaneously.
• Have a point person who can step in to read the rest of your remarks if you cannot continue.

How Long Should a Military Eulogy Be

A typical eulogy for a main speaker at a funeral runs between six and twelve minutes. If you are a secondary speaker, aim for two to four minutes. The key is clarity and respect for the family and the order of service. Practice to know how long your draft will actually take to deliver with emotion and pauses.

Sample Short Eulogies for a Reading or Brief Remarks

Use these if you need to say something short at a graveside or as a brief remembrance.

• "[Name] carried the unit through hard days with a stubborn laugh. We will keep that laugh and give it back to anyone who needs it."
• "[Name] taught us to check each other twice. Today we check in and keep the promise."
• "She was a medic who fixed wounds and listened like it mattered. We honor her by being gentler to one another."

When You Need Help Writing

Ask a fellow comrade or the chaplain to help craft drafts. Sometimes hearing your memory out loud with someone who knew the person can sharpen your language. You can also record a conversation and transcribe the best lines. That raw voice often produces the most authentic sentences.

Examples of Opening Lines You Can Use

• "I want to begin with a single truth about [Name]."
• "If you knew [Name] you knew two things right away."
• "We are here because [Name] made us better at the things that matter."

Examples of Closing Lines That Land

• "Remember [Name] when you fix something, feed someone, or laugh when it hurts."
• "Carry the light they carried and pass it to someone who needs it."
• "Until we see you again, we will keep your name alive in the small things."

Resources to Share with Families

• Veterans Crisis Line. If someone is in immediate crisis call or text 988 and press option 1 or chat online with the Veterans Crisis Line. This line helps veterans in crisis and their loved ones.
• Department of Veterans Affairs. The VA provides benefits and counseling. Visit the VA website or the local regional office for details and support.
• Unit support network. Encourage families to connect with the unit ombudsman or family readiness group for local support and updates.

FAQ

How much personal detail is OK to include in a eulogy

Include personal details that the family approves. Small, vivid stories help listeners remember the person. Avoid medical details or anything the family deems private unless you have explicit permission.

Is it appropriate to include humor

Yes if the family and the person were known for humor. Humor should be warm and not mean spirited. A single laugh moment can relieve tension and celebrate life. Avoid jokes about circumstances of death.

Should I write about the military achievements or the person first

Lead with the person. Name service and achievements after you have established the human side. The audience will better value awards and rank if they first see the person behind them.

What if I get emotional and cannot finish

Pause. Breathe. If you cannot continue, your printed copy can be handed to the chaplain or another speaker. People understand emotion is a natural response.

How do I mention suicide or sensitive circumstances

Speak with the family first and follow their preference for wording. If you must say the cause of death, use clear language and avoid euphemism. Pair the mention with resources and a message of care for those who may be struggling.

Action Plan You Can Use Right Now

1. Write one sentence that sums up who they were to you. Use plain language.
2. Add one line with rank, unit, and one service fact. Explain any acronyms.
3. Draft one memory using sensory detail. Keep it under 150 words.
4. Write one line that names what they taught you. Use first person.
5. Finish with a short closing line that invites memory. Time the whole draft and edit to fit the requested length.