How to Write a Eulogy for Your Priest - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Writing a eulogy for a priest can feel weighty and confusing. You want to honor their spiritual service, respect liturgical norms, and speak with honesty and warmth. This guide gives you a clear plan, examples you can adapt, and tips for different traditions. We explain terms you might not know and give eulogy templates you can use as starting points.

Who this guide is for

This article is for parishioners, colleagues, family members, friends, or lay leaders who have been asked to speak about a priest at a funeral, memorial, wake, or celebration of life. You may be comfortable speaking in public or this might be your first time. You might be navigating denominational rules. That is fine. Use the examples and templates and shape them to fit the community and the tone you want to set.

What is a eulogy and what is a homily

A eulogy is a personal speech that remembers the life of the person who died. It focuses on memories, character, service, and sometimes small, human moments. A homily is a short sermon or reflection usually given by the presiding clergy during a worship service. In many traditions the homily will relate faith and scripture to the life of the deceased. When the deceased is a priest or other clergy, there are special considerations about who gives the homily and who gives a eulogy.

Terms you might see

• Presider The clergy person who leads the funeral liturgy. This may be a bishop, another priest, or a minister depending on the tradition.
• Homily A sermon or reflection given during the funeral liturgy.
• Vigil A prayer gathering before the funeral often held the evening before.
• Wake A gathering for prayer and remembrance that may include open visiting time with the family.
• Order of service The schedule for the funeral listing the sequence of prayers, readings, music, and speakers.
• Diocese A regional church administrative area led by a bishop in some denominations.
• Layperson A non clergy member of the congregation.

Denominational differences you should know

Different churches have different customs about eulogies. Check with the presider or the funeral director before you write or plan to speak.

• Catholic Many Catholic parishes prefer a homily that focuses on scripture and the mystery of faith. A short eulogy may be allowed either before the service or at a vigil. The presider will advise on timing and placement.
• Anglican and Episcopal These churches often follow a liturgical order similar to Catholic practice. A eulogy might be given outside the formal liturgy or included at the discretion of the presider.
• Orthodox Funeral services are highly structured. Eulogies are usually given outside the liturgy such as at a graveside or a separate memorial service. Check with church leadership.
• Protestant Many Protestant churches are flexible. Eulogies are commonly part of the service. Consult with the pastor or church office about time and tone.
• Ecumenical or interfaith settings Be mindful of the varied expectations of attendees and coordinate with leaders to avoid surprising people with strongly worded doctrinal remarks.

Who should give the eulogy for a priest

There is no single rule. Possible speakers include a close friend, a parishioner, a fellow priest, a family member, or a lay leader. Sometimes multiple short reflections are preferable to a single long speech. The presider might request that formal remarks be brief and that personal memories be shared at a reception or wake.

How long should a eulogy for a priest be

A good length is three to six minutes. That is usually about four to seven hundred spoken words. Keep it focused. The funeral service often has many moving parts and a concise eulogy honors the schedule and the people gathered.

Deciding tone and content

Offer respect for the priest s ministry while being human. You are allowed to include small glimpses that reveal personality. Balance spiritual themes with concrete examples of pastoral care, compassion, leadership, and everyday quirks. Avoid gossip, grievances, or dense theological arguments unless the family explicitly requests that tone.

• Decide whether the eulogy will be more pastoral and formal or more conversational and personal.
• Ask family or church leadership if there are any topics to avoid.
• Gather three or four short stories or memories that highlight different aspects of the priest s life.

Structure that works

Use a simple structure so listeners can follow you. A clear shape also helps you stay calm while speaking.

• Opening Say your name and your relationship to the priest. Offer a one sentence purpose statement.
• Ministry and life sketch Give a brief overview of the priest s service, key roles, and milestones.
• Anecdotes Share one to three short stories that show character, pastoral care, humor, or a habit people will remember.
• Lessons and legacy Summarize what the congregation learned or will miss.
• Closing Offer a short prayer, blessing, quote, or invitation to remember the priest in a specific way.

Gathering material

Interview people who knew the priest well. Ask for one memory each to avoid drowning in details. Check church records for dates of ordination, assignments, education, and notable ministries. Respect privacy if someone asks you to leave out a personal detail.

Examples of short anecdotes that work

• He arrived early each Sunday and brewed a pot of coffee for volunteers. The coffee never lasted long because he was always the first to taste it and the last to refill it.
• She had a habit of writing hand written thank you notes after hospital visits. I found one in a kitchen drawer once and it felt like finding a small blessing.
• When storms knocked out power he drove through the night to check on elderly parishioners and to make sure the sump pumps were working. That is the kind of pastor he was.

How to handle theology and doctrine

Keep theological remarks simple and inclusive. Focus on character and service rather than doctrinal debates. If the priest was known for a particular theological stance, you can mention that as part of who they were but avoid turning the eulogy into an argument. If you are unsure about theological language, stick to values such as compassion, service, teaching, and hospitality.

Using humor safely

Humor can offer relief and connection. Use short, earned stories that show personality. Avoid jokes that could be misinterpreted as disrespectful or that single out individuals in the congregation.

Safe humor examples

• He once tried to lead a sing along and the organist looked at him as if to say we have never practiced that hymn. He smiled, and we all sang anyway and it was glorious in its chaos.
• She collected rubber ducks for hospital patients and had a tiny army of them in her office. She said they were holy helpers and the patients loved them.

What to avoid

• Avoid private family disputes or pastoral complaints.
• Avoid heavy critique of the church or flashy political commentary unless the family has specifically asked for that voice.
• Avoid going long on titles, degrees, or a resume style list without stories to give them life.
• Avoid reading a long script with no emotion. A natural, human voice is more powerful.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Example 1: Short pastoral tribute, three to four minutes

Hello. I am Anna. I have been a member of St Luke s for twelve years and it is my honor to say a few words about Father Michael.

Father Michael was ordained here twenty five years ago. He served this parish with steady hands and a listening heart. He led our soup kitchen for twenty years and taught the confirmation class that many of us remember with fondness and occasional embarrassment.

One small memory tells you what kind of pastor he was. A teenager showed up after school nervous and ashamed. Father Michael sat with that young person on our steps, took time to listen, and then walked with them to the counselor s office. He did not make a show of it. He simply made sure that person felt seen and safe. That was his ministry in a sentence.

He taught us to make space for one another and to believe that small acts of kindness matter. We will miss his steady presence and his knack for making complicated theology sound like a story anyone could understand. Please join me in a moment of silence and then in the Lord s prayer if you are able.

Example 2: Formal reflection from a fellow priest, four to six minutes

My name is Reverend James and I served with Father Thomas in the deanery. Thomas had a pastoral imagination that made him a gift to the people he served. He prayed with conviction and he preached with a balance of honesty and hope.

He loved liturgy and music but his real gift was pastoral care. I remember visiting him after surgery and finding a stack of hand written notes from parishioners thanking him for a service of healing he had led months earlier. He never sought applause. He sought presence.

Thomas leaves a legacy of faithful service and friendship. He taught many of us how to be patient in grief and how to find God in small acts. Let us pray for him and for all who mourn.

Example 3: Celebration of life tone with warmth and humor

Hi everyone. I am Maria and I worked with Pastor Sam on youth nights. If you ever visited a youth nite you would remember Pastor Sam s playlist. He thought hymns needed a remix and the kids believed him. He would show up wearing sneakers with his cassock and proclaim that comfortable shoes were a pastoral necessity.

He made liturgy accessible and he made us laugh. Once he mistook a birthday cake for the offertory elements for a laugh and scandalized half the ushers until they realized it was a cake and not sacred bread. He loved people and loved messes of every kind because that was where the kingdom showed up.

We will miss his energy and his ridiculous playlists. He taught us to make room for joy and to take care of one another. Let us honor him by doing both.

Example 4: For a young priest, honest and tender

Hello. I am Daniel, a friend and colleague of Father Luis. He was a young priest with an old soul. He listened like someone who had all the time in the world even when his schedule was full.

He volunteered with the homeless outreach and brought a creative energy to the team. He never minimized suffering. Instead he sat with it and offered practical help and a prayer. His life reminds us that pastoral care is practice not performance.

We grieve what was taken from him and we celebrate how he loved. We will carry his example forward by showing up for the people who need us the most.

Fill in the blank templates you can use

Use these templates and add your own stories. Read them out loud and edit to make the voice sound like you.

Template A: Short pastoral tribute

My name is [Your Name]. I am a member of [parish name] and have known Father [Name] for [years]. He was ordained in [year] and served as [role or assignment]. One memory that shows his heart is [brief story]. He taught us [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here to honor him.

Template B: From a fellow clergy person

Hello. I am Reverend [Name] and I served with Father [Name] in [context]. He modeled [quality]. I remember when [short story]. That story says everything about his ministry because [explain why]. Let us pray for him and for the community he loved.

Template C: Light and warm for a celebration of life

Hi. I am [Your Name]. To know Father [Name] was to know that he loved [quirky habit or hobby]. He also made sure that [practical thing]. My favorite memory is [funny or tender story]. He made us laugh and he taught us to serve. Let s honor him by doing both.

Practical tips for writing and delivery

• Ask the presider about timing and placement Confirm whether your remarks should be part of the liturgy, at the vigil, or at a reception.
• Keep it short and focused Three to six minutes is ideal. Two or three short stories beat a long chronology.
• Use plain language Avoid theological jargon unless you are sure the audience will follow it.
• Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend, a mirror, or record yourself once. It helps with pacing and emotion.
• Bring a printed copy Use large font and clearly marked pauses. Index cards can help you find your place.
• Mark emotional beats Put a note where you expect to pause, where laughter might happen, and where you will breathe.
• Have a backup Arrange for someone to step in if you cannot finish. This usually calms nerves before you start.
• Be mindful of microphone technique Keep the mic a few inches from your mouth and speak steadily. Project if there is no amplification.

When you are nervous or grieving

It is normal to cry or to stumble over words. Pause, breathe, look at your notes, and continue. You are allowed to be human in that room. If you think you will be unable to continue, have a friend stand ready to finish a short line. The congregation wants to support you and will be patient.

Including prayers, readings, and music

If you include a scripture reading or a prayer, coordinate with the presider. Choose short passages that complement your remarks. If a hymn will follow your talk, time your ending to allow the congregation to move into song without an awkward gap.

Logistics and who to tell

• Tell the funeral director or the church office if you will need a microphone or printed copies.
• Give a copy of your remarks to the person running the order of service so they can include it in the booklet if appropriate.
• Confirm where you will stand and how long you may speak.

After the eulogy

People may ask for a copy. Offer to email it or to provide a printed version. Some families include eulogies in a memory book or on the parish website. Ask permission before posting audio or video online because some families prefer privacy.

Glossary of useful terms and acronyms

• Eulogy A speech given to remember the life of someone who has died.
• Homily A short sermon or reflection usually given by clergy during a worship service.
• Presider The clergy person who leads the worship or funeral liturgy.
• Vigil A prayer gathering often held before the funeral service.
• Order of service The schedule of elements in a funeral such as readings, music, and speakers.
• Diocese A regional administrative area of a church led by a bishop in some traditions.
• Layperson A non clergy member of the congregation.

Frequently asked questions

Who should give the eulogy for a priest

There are many options. A family member, a close friend, a fellow priest, or a lay leader can give the eulogy. Check with the presider to know when and where the eulogy should happen and whether multiple brief reflections are preferred.

Can a eulogy be given during the funeral mass or service

That depends on denomination and local custom. In some churches the presider prefers the homily to handle theological reflection and asks that personal memories be shared at the vigil or at a reception. Always confirm with the presider or the church office.

How long should a eulogy for a priest be

Three to six minutes is a good target. This keeps the service moving and respects the other parts of the liturgy. If many people are speaking, shorter is better.

What should I include for a priest who served many years

Focus on a few meaningful stories that highlight pastoral care, leadership, and personality. Mention key ministries and the ways the priest shaped community life but avoid a long resume. Personal anecdotes make the list come alive.

Is it appropriate to include humor

Yes, when it is gentle and earned. Short humorous memories that show the priest s humanity can comfort people. Avoid anything that could be taken as disrespectful.

What if I had a complicated relationship with the priest

Speak honestly but with charity. You can acknowledge complexity and name any reconciliation or lessons learned. Keep the focus on what will help the community grieve and remember in a balanced way.