Funeral Speech Advice

Writing Your Own Eulogy In The Words Of Who

Writing Your Own Eulogy In The Words Of Who

Writing your own eulogy is a unique and powerful experience. It provides an opportunity for self-reflection, a chance to consider the impact we've had on the lives of those around us, and a window into how we'd like to be remembered. In this article, we will explore the idea of writing your own eulogy in the words of who – that is, from the perspective of various people in your life. This approach offers a deeper understanding of your relationships and highlights the qualities you value most in yourself.

Why Write Your Own Eulogy In The Words Of Who?

Writing your own eulogy can be a cathartic and insightful exercise. It helps you take stock of your life and legacy, appreciate your achievements and contributions, and identify areas where you may want to grow or change. By writing your eulogy from the perspective of others, you get to:

  • Gain insights into how your life has touched others
  • Discover the traits and values you hold in high esteem
  • Recognize patterns in your relationships
  • Encourage empathy and understanding

Choose Your Perspectives

Begin by selecting several key people in your life whose perspectives you'd like to write from. These could be family members, friends, colleagues, or even pets. Consider selecting a diverse range of relationships to gain a broader understanding of your impact.

Understand Their Point of View

To write effectively from someone else's perspective, you need to understand their thoughts and feelings about you. Consider what you know about their opinions, shared experiences, and how they might perceive your qualities and actions. Put yourself in their shoes as you write, trying to capture their emotions and tone.

Highlight Your Personal Qualities and Achievements

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From each perspective, write about the most meaningful qualities, achievements, and memories they associate with you. Think about what they might appreciate most about you and moments you've shared, exploring your life through their eyes. This process helps reveal the impact you've had on others and the values you hold dear.

Structure Your Eulogy

As you write from each perspective, organize your eulogy into sections, such as:

  1. Introduction: Anecdotes or quotes that capture the essence of your relationship
  2. Personal Qualities: Traits and values that are important to you and your relationship
  3. Achievements and Contributions: Accomplishments both big and small that have left a lasting impact
  4. Memorable Moments: Shared experiences, stories, and memories that stand out
  5. Closing: Final thoughts and words of gratitude, love, or inspiration

Writing Your Own Eulogy In The Words Of Who Example:

A Sample Eulogy From The Perspective Of A Sibling


As [Your Name]'s sister, I've had the privilege of growing up by their side, experiencing life's ups and downs together. Our bond is strong, built on countless shared memories, laughter, and love.

Personal Qualities:

[Your Name] has always been incredibly kind-hearted and compassionate. They never hesitate to lend a helping hand or offer a listening ear, teaching me the importance of empathy and understanding.

Achievements and Contributions:

I couldn't be more proud of [Your Name]'s dedication to their career in nursing. They've touched countless lives through their hard work and selflessness, making a real difference in the world.

Memorable Moments:

One of my fondest memories with [Your Name] was our magical vacation to Hawaii, where we surfed, hiked, and sipped sunset cocktails. It was a reminder that life's greatest joys come from quality time spent with loved ones.


I am eternally grateful for the bond we share, and I know [Your Name] will continue to inspire and touch the lives of everyone they meet. Thank you, [Your Name], for being my rock and my light.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the purpose of writing my own eulogy?

Writing your own eulogy serves multiple purposes. It allows you to reflect on your life and the legacy you want to leave behind. It can also be a therapeutic exercise, helping you to articulate your values and the mark you wish to make on the world. Additionally, it can provide guidance to your loved ones on how you want to be remembered and ensure that your life is celebrated in a way that feels true to you.

Isn't it morbid to write my own eulogy?

While some may find the thought of writing their own eulogy to be uncomfortable, it is actually a proactive and positive step. It is an opportunity to think about your life's impact and express your thoughts and feelings about your journey. It allows you to take control of your narrative and can be a deeply meaningful and life-affirming activity.

How can I encapsulate my entire life in a single eulogy?

Your eulogy doesn't need to cover every detail of your life but instead should highlight key moments, relationships, and values that define you. It is more about capturing the essence of who you are rather than creating an exhaustive biography.

Can writing my own eulogy help with my fears about death?

Yes, for many people, the process of writing their own eulogy can help them come to terms with the concept of mortality. It is a way of facing fears head-on and can provide a sense of peace and resolution.

Do I need to be a good writer to write my own eulogy?

No, you don't need to be a professional writer to create your eulogy. The most important aspect is authenticity and speaking from the heart. If you are able to convey your feelings and thoughts, you have succeeded in writing your eulogy.

How do I start writing my own eulogy?

Start by reflecting on your life, your achievements, relationships, and the lessons you have learned. Consider what you would want others to say about you and the memories you want to leave behind. Writing prompts or a structured outline can help initiate the process.

What are some common themes people explore in their eulogies?

Common themes include one's passions, significant life events, personal growth, relationships, accomplishments, challenges overcome, and contributions to others' lives. These themes can reflect the most meaningful aspects of your existence.

Should I share my written eulogy with my loved ones?

Sharing your eulogy can be a powerful way to communicate your life's reflections and wishes with loved ones. It can also make the end-of-life process easier for relatives and friends, as they will understand your sentiments and can honor your memory as you desired.

How often should I update my eulogy?

Your eulogy should change as you do, reflecting new experiences and insights. It's a good idea to review and possibly update it every few years or after significant life events.

What tone should I aim for in writing my eulogy?

The tone of your eulogy should be true to you. Some may choose a tone that is reflective, others may prefer a lighter or even humorous tone. Consider how you want to be remembered and let that guide the tone of your writing.

Can I include messages to specific people in my eulogy?

Yes, addressing valued individuals directly can add a deeply personal touch to your eulogy. It's an opportunity to express gratitude, love, forgiveness, or any final thoughts you wish to share.

What if my life hasn't gone the way I planned or hoped?

Life's unpredictability is something everyone faces. Writing your eulogy can be an opportunity to make peace with the past and highlight how you've adapted or grown from unexpected challenges.

Should my eulogy be serious or can I use humor?

Your eulogy should reflect your personality. If humor is a significant part of who you are, then it is entirely appropriate to include it. However, balance is key—consider the feelings of those who will hear it.

How personal should my eulogy be?

The personal nature of your eulogy is up to you—it can be as private or as open as you feel comfortable with. Remember that your eulogy will be shared with others, so include what you would be comfortable having heard by family, friends, and acquaintances.

Can writing a eulogy be considered a part of my legacy planning?

Absolutely. Just like writing a will or outlining your wishes for after you're gone, a eulogy is a part of legacy planning. It ensures your story is told in the way you wish, contributing to how you will be remembered.

What happens if I write my eulogy but don't want it used after I pass away?

You are under no obligation to have your self-written eulogy read at your funeral or memorial service. It can remain a private document, or you can give explicit instructions on its use. The decision is entirely yours.

Are there any ethical considerations I should keep in mind?

While writing your eulogy is a personal process, consider the impact of your words on those you leave behind. It's important to be truthful but also sensitive to others' feelings.

How can I make sure my eulogy reflects who I am accurately?

To ensure your eulogy reflects your true self, you might want to include narratives or anecdotes that capture your character, seek feedback from close acquaintances, or reflect on feedback you've received throughout your life about your impact on others.

What should I do if I'm struggling to write my own eulogy?

If you're finding it difficult to write your eulogy, consider reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, or even a professional such as a therapist or a life coach for guidance and support.

Can I get professional help with writing my eulogy?

Yes, there are professionals, like writers or end-of-life planners, who can assist you in articulating and composing your eulogy. They can provide structure and ask insightful questions that draw out the essential points you want to cover.

Would writing my own eulogy affect my day-to-day life?

Writing your eulogy can be an introspective process that may bring clarity and renewed focus to your daily life. It can encourage you to live more intentionally, knowing you have a say in how you will be remembered.

Is there a right or wrong way to write a eulogy?

There is no right or wrong way to write a eulogy, as it is a deeply personal expression. The key is to create something that feels true to you and that you believe represents your life's experiences and values.

Writing your own eulogy in the words of others can be an incredibly insightful and gratifying experience. It's a reminder of the impact we have on those around us and a chance to reflect on what truly matters in life. If you found this guide helpful, please share it with others who may find it valuable, and explore further resources from Eulogy Assistant to create a heartfelt funeral speech for yourself or loved ones.

Need a Eulogy?
Get a Personalized Professional Eulogy Written For Your Loved One

Writing a eulogy for a loved one you have just lost, can be both challenging and painful. Alongside the pressure of delivering a meaningful tribute in front of other funeral guests.

Let our expert Funeral Speech Writers create a heartfelt & personalized eulogy, that captures the amazing life and memories of your loved one.

Learn more about our Professional Eulogy Writing Service today, and see how we can help you.


About Jeffery Isleworth

Jeffery Isleworth is an experienced eulogy and funeral speech writer who has dedicated his career to helping people honor their loved ones in a meaningful way. With a background in writing and public speaking, Jeffery has a keen eye for detail and a talent for crafting heartfelt and authentic tributes that capture the essence of a person's life.Jeffery's passion for writing eulogies and funeral speeches stems from his belief that everyone deserves to be remembered with dignity and respect. He understands that this can be a challenging time for families and friends, and he strives to make the process as smooth and stress-free as possible.Over the years, Jeffery has helped countless families create beautiful and memorable eulogies and funeral speeches. His clients appreciate his warm and empathetic approach, as well as his ability to capture the essence of their loved one's personality and life story.When he's not writing eulogies and funeral speeches, Jeffery enjoys spending time with his family, reading, and traveling. He believes that life is precious and should be celebrated, and he feels honored to help families do just that through his writing.