Losing someone is never easy, and one of the hardest parts can be writing a eulogy for someone who isn't dead. This may sound strange, but oftentimes, people are asked or choose to write a eulogy for a living person, either for a retirement celebration, recognition event, or even for their own funeral in advance. While it might seem daunting, writing a eulogy for someone who is still alive can actually be a very heartfelt and meaningful experience.
Are you struggling to write a meaningful eulogy during this difficult time? Our professional eulogy writing service can help you honour your loved one in less than 48 hours, with no additional stress. We help you preserve the legacy of a cherished life, in your time of grief. Find out more →
Table of Contents
Why Write a Eulogy for Someone Who Isn't Dead?
There are several reasons why someone might want to write a eulogy for a living person, such as:
- A retirement party or milestone celebration, where the individual is being honored for their accomplishments and dedication to a particular field or cause.
- A “living funeral” or a “celebration of life," where the person chooses to have their funeral or memorial service while they are still alive to be part of the experience.
- As a tribute to a mentor or loved one who has had a significant impact on your life.
- For advance planning purposes, when someone is dealing with a terminal illness and wants to ensure that their eulogy captures their life and legacy as they envision it.
Steps for Writing a Eulogy for a Living Person
When writing a eulogy for someone who is still with us, these steps can help guide you through the process:
1. Have a Conversation with the Person
Since the individual is still alive, take the opportunity to have a conversation with them about their life, accomplishments, and the values they hold dear. This conversation will provide valuable insight to help you craft a meaningful eulogy that captures the essence of who they are.
2. Gather Information
Need a Eulogy?
Get a Personalized Professional Eulogy Written For Your Loved One
Reach out to family, friends, and colleagues to gather stories, anecdotes, and memories that will showcase the person's character, achievements, and impact on others. This can also be a great way to learn more about their interests, hobbies, and passions that you may not have been aware of.
3. Organize and Structure
Break the eulogy down into sections and determine what key themes, moments, or values you want to focus on. This will help you create a flow and balance to the speech, making it engaging and easier to follow for the listeners.
4. Keep it Personal
Include personal anecdotes and stories to make the eulogy unique to the individual. This will help showcase their personality and make the eulogy more relatable and authentic.
5. End with a Meaningful Close
Finish the eulogy by expressing gratitude for the person's influence and their lasting impact. This will leave the audience with a sense of closure and appreciation for the individual being honored.
How To Write A Eulogy For Someone Who Isnt Dead Example:
Example Eulogy for a Mentor's Retirement Celebration
```
Good evening, everyone. As many of you know, today marks a bittersweet occasion as we celebrate the retirement of our beloved mentor, Mr. James. I'm honored to have the opportunity to stand before you and share a few words about the incredible impact he's had on all of us.
(Insert story/anecdote about how Mr. James has impacted your life)
As a teacher and mentor, Mr. James has not only educated us in the world of literature but has also instilled in us a love for learning and a passion for curiosity. There is no doubt that countless students have been inspired by his dedication, and I'm proud to be one of them.
(Insert story about his dedication to teaching or specific moment that showcases his character)
In addition to his career accomplishments, Mr. James is a true friend and confidant to many. His generosity, kindness, and warmth have been felt by countless people over the years, and I know that we are all better for having known him.
(Insert personal story about friendship with Mr. James)
As Mr. James begins the next chapter of his life, we want him to know how truly grateful we are for everything that he's done for us. His impact will continue to be felt for generations to come, and we look forward to seeing what incredible things he'll accomplish in retirement.
(Concluding remarks expressing gratitude and well wishes for the future)
```
Frequently Asked Questions
When should one write a eulogy for someone who is still alive?
Writing a eulogy for someone who is still alive might be appropriate for various reasons. Some choose to do so on the occasion of a milestone birthday, retirement, or a significant life event, to pay tribute to the person's impact and legacy while they are still alive to appreciate it. Alternatively, it might be done as part of a living funeral or when a person is facing a terminal illness and wants to hear the words of appreciation and love that would typically be shared after their passing.
What are the benefits of writing a eulogy for someone who is still alive?
The benefits include an opportunity for the person being honored to hear and appreciate the positive impact they've had on others, providing an emotional and reflective moment for everyone involved. It can also serve as a cathartic and healing experience for the writer and the audience, facilitating the expression of deep feelings and appreciation often reserved for after death.
How do you start a eulogy for someone who's still living?
You could begin by expressing the unique opportunity and profound purpose of the moment, acknowledging that while eulogies are traditionally for one no longer with us, this is a chance to celebrate an individual before their passing. Start with a fond memory, anecdote, or a heartfelt expression of what the person means to you and to those present.
What tone should I use when writing this type of eulogy?
Maintain a respectful and warm tone throughout. While it can include humor and lighthearted stories if fitting, it is essential to focus on the positive contributions and significance of the individual's life. Empathetic understanding of the person’s feelings about hearing their eulogy should guide the tone.
How can I incorporate the individual’s accomplishments into the eulogy?
Celebrate key accomplishments by recounting stories or milestones that highlight these successes and the qualities that enabled them, offering both facts and personal insights. Address the difference these achievements have made in the lives of others or to a broader community without turning the eulogy into an exhaustive list. It's more about the embodiment of their life's work than a chronology of events.
Can I include humor in a eulogy written for someone alive?
Absolutely. Adding humor can help celebrate the individual's personality and make the moment more comfortable and genuine. Ensure that any humorous anecdotes or jokes are appropriate and sensitive to the feelings of the person being honored, avoiding anything that could be misconstrued or offensive.
Is it okay to talk about personal challenges the person has overcome?
Yes, discussing personal challenges the person has overcome can be inspirational. It's important, however, to handle this with care, ensuring you have the individual's consent to share such details and that you present this information in a way that highlights their strength and resilience without dwelling on negative aspects.
Should I mention how the person influenced my life in the eulogy?
Personal reflections on how the individual has influenced your life can make the eulogy more heartfelt and meaningful. Share specific examples or lessons learned that have had a lasting impact on you, personalizing the tribute and making it deeply relatable to others.
Is it okay to invite others to contribute to the eulogy?
Yes, inviting contributions from others can enrich the eulogy by providing a more rounded view of the person's life and impact. It can also make the occasion more communal and supportive, especially if others share similar sentiments or cherished memories.
What length should the eulogy be?
While there is no strict rule, aim for a length that allows you to express your sentiments fully without being overly lengthy—it's typically advisable to keep it under ten minutes. This is enough time to articulate your thoughts without losing the attention of the audience.
How personal should the eulogy be?
The eulogy should be personal enough to reflect your true feelings and relationship with the individual, but balanced enough to resonate with others who may also have diverse connections with them. Remember that the eulogy will be shared with a wider audience, so consider the privacy and comfort level of the person being honored when sharing personal anecdotes or details.
Can a eulogy for someone alive be used to address unfinished business or apologies?
Although it might be tempting to use this opportunity to address unfinished business or past grievances, a eulogy should primarily be a positive reflection on the individual's life. If you feel the need to offer an apology, consider doing so privately to maintain the spirit of celebration and respect during the eulogy.
What if I get emotional while delivering the eulogy?
It's natural to feel emotional when speaking about someone important to you. If you become emotional, take a moment to compose yourself, and remember that those present will likely understand and empathize with your emotions. It's okay to show vulnerability during such a heartfelt tribute.
How can I practice delivering the eulogy?
Practice your eulogy several times before the day you plan to deliver it. Read it aloud to yourself, in front of a mirror, or to a trusted friend or family member. This will help you become more comfortable with the content and the emotions that might arise, and will also give you a chance to refine your speech and receive feedback.
What if I'm not a good public speaker?
Remember that the focus of a eulogy is the sentiment behind the words, not the delivery. Speak from the heart and at your own pace. If public speaking makes you uncomfortable, consider reading from a written speech or even recording your eulogy to be played during the event if the person being honoured consents to this method.
How do I handle contrasting perspectives or opinions when writing the eulogy?
Recognize that every person has a multifaceted life and that different people may have experienced various aspects of the individual. Strive for balance by focusing on shared values and universally appreciated traits. It's not necessary to address every perspective in detail, but rather to capture the essence of the individual's impact.
Is it appropriate to ask the person being eulogized for their input?
It can be appropriate and sometimes beneficial to ask the individual for input if they are comfortable with that. This can ensure accuracy and gives them an opportunity to reflect on their life and perhaps highlight aspects they consider significant. Always approach this conversation with sensitivity and respect for their feelings.
What if the person being eulogized has a complex legacy?
In the case of a complex legacy, focus on the aspects of the person's life that brought about positive change or growth, both in their own life and in the lives of others. It is essential to write with empathy and understanding, acknowledging the person’s humanity and the multifaceted nature of any life.
How can I conclude the eulogy in a powerful way?
To conclude the eulogy powerfully, circle back to the core sentiments expressed at the beginning, and encapsulate the overarching message of your tribute. You could finish with a memorable quote that the person admires, a brief restatement of their lasting impact, or a personal message of gratitude for their presence in your life.
Can I share my written eulogy with others before the event?
Sharing your written eulogy with close friends, family members, or trusted colleagues before the event can be useful to gather feedback and to ensure your words resonate well. Just be sure to be receptive to constructive criticism and remember that the final product should reflect your true feelings and intentions.
How specific should anecdotes or stories in the eulogy be?
Stories and anecdotes should be specific enough to illustrate the qualities, achievements, and character of the person being eulogized but succinct enough to keep the attention of your audience. Prioritize those that have broad appeal or give keen insight into the person's nature.
If writing a eulogy for a parental figure, how can I balance the personal with the universal?
When writing a eulogy for a parent, sharing personal stories that are also relatable can effectively balance the intimate with the universal. Highlight qualities that many can appreciate, such as kindness, integrity, or dedication, while also sharing specific examples that demonstrate these virtues in your unique relationship.
What should I avoid saying in a eulogy for someone who is still alive?
Avoid remarks that might imply finality or sound like a farewell. Steer clear of negative comments, criticisms, or anything that could cause discomfort or embarrassment. Remember, the aim is to celebrate the person’s life and to make the moment a joyful and meaningful reflection of their contributions and connections.
Writing a eulogy for someone who isn't dead can be a unique and heartfelt experience. It's the perfect opportunity to express your appreciation for their life and impact while they are still here to hear those words. If you find yourself struggling or need a little help along the way, don't hesitate to explore other guides and tools on Eulogy Assistant. Together, we can create a beautiful tribute to honor the special individual in your life. And, if you found this guide helpful, please feel free to share it with others who might benefit from it as well.