Writing a eulogy for someone from your unit feels different and heavy in a way most eulogies do not. This person may have been a fellow soldier, sailor, airman, marine, guard, first responder, or team member who shared missions, late nights, and inside jokes. You want to honor that bond, respect military or unit protocol, and say something true that lands for both civilians and comrades. This guide gives a clear plan, templates you can adapt, examples for different tones, and practical protocol tips so your words fit the moment.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy for a unit member
- Terms and acronyms you might see
- First steps before writing
- Structure that works for a unit member eulogy
- How to open
- Writing the service summary
- Anecdotes that matter
- How to address combat related or sensitive deaths
- When the relationship was complicated
- Using humor in a unit eulogy
- What to avoid
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Formal, short military funeral, three to four minutes
- Example 2: Informal, combat buddy, heartfelt and short
- Example 3: Civilian working with a unit, respectful and clear
- Fill in the blank templates
- Delivery tips specific to unit settings
- Readings, music, and symbolic acts
- After the eulogy
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone asked to speak about a unit member at a memorial, memorial service, funeral, chapel service, formation, or celebration of life. Maybe you were chosen because you were closest in rank, the unit sergeant, the squad leader, a friend, or you were the one who knew their jokes. Maybe you are a civilian who worked with the unit and was asked to say a few words. The examples and templates below are written to be adaptable for formal military settings and for more informal gatherings.
What is a eulogy for a unit member
A eulogy for a unit member is a short speech that honors and remembers someone who served alongside you. It is not an official report. It is a personal tribute. It can acknowledge service, character, skills, and the small things buddies notice like how they packed a ruck or how they always fixed the radio. If the death is combat related or sensitive, coordinate with command or the chaplain before giving details. Your eulogy should balance truth, respect for the family, and the culture of your unit.
Terms and acronyms you might see
- Unit The group the deceased served with. This could be a squad, platoon, company, battalion, or any organized team.
- Chaplain A religious officer who supports spiritual and emotional needs within the unit.
- Casualty assistance The support process and personnel assigned to help the family after a death in service. This includes the Casualty Assistance Officer.
- Honor guard A team that performs ceremonial duties such as folding the flag or presenting it to the family.
- TAPS The bugle call played at military funerals and memorials. It is often used as a moment of reflection.
- KIA Killed in action. This term is used when a service member dies in combat.
- MIA Missing in action. This refers to personnel unaccounted for after a mission or engagement.
- POW Prisoner of war. A service member captured by an enemy.
First steps before writing
Start with these practical checks. They keep you out of protocol trouble and help shape what you will say.
- Talk to the family Ask what they would like you to say and whether any details should be left out. Families often have preferences about mentioning cause of death or deployment specifics.
- Check with command or the chaplain For formal events confirm appropriate protocol, whether rank should be used, and if the unit prefers a formal tone or a personal one.
- Confirm time Find out the time limit. Military funerals and public memorials often have strict schedules. Aim for three to seven minutes unless you were told otherwise.
- Gather stories Ask teammates for one memory each. Small, specific anecdotes show who the person was better than long lists of awards.
- Decide the tone The tone can be formal, candid, celebratory, or a mix. Make sure your choice matches the family and the unit culture.
Structure that works for a unit member eulogy
Use a clear shape so listeners can follow and remember key points.
- Opening State your name, your role in the unit, and your relationship to the deceased. Keep the first line simple and grounding.
- Service summary Give a brief sketch of their service and roles. Mention rank if relevant and if permitted by family.
- Anecdotes Share one or two short stories that reveal character. These can be funny or serious but keep them specific.
- Traits and impact Highlight the qualities people will remember and the way the unit will carry that person forward.
- Closing Offer a final line of farewell, a reading, or invite a moment of silence. If appropriate, suggest a unit action like ringing a bell or raising a glass.
How to open
Open with clarity. This sets the tone and helps you breathe before the heavier parts.
Opening examples
- Good morning. I am Specialist Jordan Reed and I served as Alex s fire team leader for two years.
- My name is Captain Maya Ortiz. I had the honor to lead Corporal Lee on two deployments.
- Hi, I am Sam. We worked side by side in logistics and I was lucky to call Jamal my friend.
Writing the service summary
The service summary is a short factual sketch. Avoid turning it into a list of awards without context. Use it to link to the person s character.
Service summary templates
- [Name] enlisted in [year] and served with [unit]. He was a [rank] and worked as [job].
- [Name] deployed to [place] with our unit. She kept her calm under pressure and made sure everyone had water when the rest of us forgot to drink.
Anecdotes that matter
Stories yield feeling. Keep them short and sensory. A good anecdote has a setup, an action, and a small payoff that ties back to who the person was.
Example anecdotes
- During a midnight convoy, he crawled out in the rain to fix a busted marker light. He came back covered in mud and said I could not leave the truck dark. That was just him. He never left a corner unfinished.
- She had a ritual before every briefing. She brewed coffee like it was a protest against chaos. If the coffee was bad we all knew the world was still salvageable because she was in it.
- At the unit potluck he brought three pans of cornbread and still managed to be the last one standing in the cleanup line. He believed in showing up twice as much as he talked.
How to address combat related or sensitive deaths
If the death is combat related or the family has asked for discretion, do not share graphic details. Focus on character, service, and what the person meant to you. Coordinate with the chain of command and with casualty assistance staff so your remarks do not conflict with official messaging or the family s wishes.
When the relationship was complicated
Unit relationships can be messy. You shared stress, conflict, and loyalty. If your relationship was complicated you can still speak honestly and respectfully. Acknowledge complexity without broadcasting private disputes. Focus on what you learned or the moments that felt like repair.
Examples for complicated relationships
- We did not always see eye to eye. He pushed hard and expected the same. Over time I learned why he pushed. He wanted us to be ready. I respect that even when it was tough.
- She could be blunt. That bluntness saved lives once. It is what we will remember.
Using humor in a unit eulogy
Humor can be a needed breath. Use small earned jokes that teammates will recognize and that will not embarrass the family. Avoid anything that could be misconstrued by civilians or the press if the event is public.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Safe humor examples
- He had a five minute rule. If you were early by five minutes he would still say you were late and make you do push ups. He kept standards high and laughs higher.
- Her idea of camouflage involved too many pockets and snacks. We always knew where to find emergency granola and a joke.
What to avoid
- Avoid operational details that should not be public. If you are unsure check with command or casualty assistance.
- Avoid political commentary or blame. This is a tribute to a person not a platform for debate.
- Avoid raw or graphic descriptions of the death. Keep dignity for the deceased and the family.
- Avoid long lists of awards without human stories that make those awards mean something.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
Each example below follows the structure above. Replace bracketed text with your details and practice out loud.
Example 1: Formal, short military funeral, three to four minutes
Good morning. I am Sergeant First Class Ryan Cole and I served with Master Sergeant Daniel Pierce in Charlie Company. Dan enlisted in 2009 and served as our platoon sergeant. He was the person we looked to when plans changed at the last second and when someone needed to be seen.
Dan had a way of making complicated things look simple. During a night movement last year the comms went down. While we were all rerouting he sat under a single light and rewired the whole system with a roll of tape and determination. He never wanted a medal. He wanted the radio to work and the team to get home.
He taught us to check each other s gear, to say thank you for small favors, and to carry the weight of the team without complaint. We will miss his steady voice and the way he could turn a bad night into a learning moment. It was an honor to serve with him.
Example 2: Informal, combat buddy, heartfelt and short
Hi, I am Tyler. We were a team for three deployments. Marcus loved terrible coffee, worse playlists, and he could fix anything with a bobby pin and stubbornness. He was the guy who pulled you out of a hole and then made sure you ate first.
My favorite memory is when we got stuck on a dust road and the truck would not start. Marcus spent an hour cursing the machine into working and then handed me a dented can of soda like it was a trophy. He had a ridiculous optimism that made us laugh even when we were tired.
He taught me loyalty and how to forgive quickly. That kind of friend is rare. I will miss him with everything I have.
Example 3: Civilian working with a unit, respectful and clear
Hello, I am Aisha. I coordinated medical resupply for the unit and worked closely with Specialist Kim. She was precise and calm. If paperwork was a battlefield she would always win. She made sure supplies arrived and arrived right.
When a storm shut the base down she stayed three shifts to sort inventory and then organized a small fundraiser to help the families who lost property. She was meticulous and kind in equal measure. The unit is a better place because of her work.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Thank you for letting me share that. Her care reached beyond our spreadsheets.
Fill in the blank templates
Template A: Formal military
Good morning. I am [Rank and Name] and I served with [Name] in [Unit]. [Name] enlisted in [year] and served as a [role]. One moment that shows who [Name] was occurred when [brief story]. [Name] taught us [trait or lesson]. We will remember [what people will miss]. Thank you.
Template B: Combat buddy or close friend
Hi. I am [Name]. We were teammates for [timeframe]. [Name] was the person who always [quirky habit]. My favorite memory is [short anecdote]. If I had to name one thing about [Name] that I will carry forward it is [value or lesson]. I miss you, brother sister friend. Thank you for everything.
Template C: Civilian colleague or first responder
Hello, my name is [Name]. I worked with [Name] on [task or mission]. They were reliable, practical, and they made the logistics look easy. A quick story that shows this is [brief story]. Their work saved time and often eased someone s day. Thank you.
Delivery tips specific to unit settings
- Coordinate with the chaplain or officiant They will tell you where to stand, whether to use rank, and when to pause for taps or flag presentation.
- Check microphone and protocol Make sure amplifiers work at an outdoor formation. If no mic is available project slowly and clearly.
- Wear appropriate attire If you are in uniform follow dress standards. Civilian speakers should dress respectfully and avoid casual wear unless the family requested an informal vibe.
- Bring a printed copy Index cards are easier to manage than a phone in emotional moments. Mark places to pause such as when taps plays.
- Practice cadence Military audiences often appreciate measured pacing. Practice a steady pace and mark breaths.
- Plan a signal if you need a moment Ask a friend or officer to step up with a simple line if you cannot continue. Most teams plan for this.
Readings, music, and symbolic acts
Short readings and songs can support the eulogy. If taps, flag folding, or a gun salute are planned coordinate timing. If you want to include a poem pick a short excerpt. Check with the family and the officiant about religious content. Symbolic acts like raising a hand in salute, performing a unit tradition, or sharing a moment of silence are often meaningful and appropriate.
After the eulogy
People will ask for a copy. Offer to email it to family or to the unit s point person. The unit may want to include the text in a memorial book or on a remembrance wall. If you recorded your remarks get permission before sharing anything publicly.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Unit The team or group the person served in such as a squad platoon or company.
- Chaplain The person who provides spiritual care and often coordinates ceremonies.
- Honor guard Personnel who perform ceremonial duties at funerals and memorials.
- TAPS The bugle call played at military funerals.
- KIA Killed in action. Use only if confirmed and appropriate to mention.
- Casualty assistance Support services provided to the family including logistics and benefits information.
- Flag presentation The folded flag presented to the next of kin during military funerals.
- Formation A formal lineup of unit members for briefings or ceremonies.
Frequently asked questions
Can I mention rank and awards in the eulogy
Yes if the family and command agree. Rank and awards can be part of a service summary but avoid turning the speech into a list of decorations. Use those facts to support a story about character or service.
What if the death was combat related and the family asked for privacy
Respect the family s request and coordinate with casualty assistance. Focus on character and personal memories. Avoid operational details and do not speculate about circumstances publicly.
How long should a eulogy for a unit member be
Three to seven minutes is a good target. Short focused remarks often carry more weight, especially when ceremonies include taps flag presentation or multiple speakers.
Can I use humor
Yes in small earned doses. Humor helps people breathe but make sure jokes are respectful and that the family and unit culture will receive them well. When in doubt choose a heartfelt memory instead.
What if I get emotional and cannot finish
Pause and breathe. If you cannot continue a prearranged person such as the chaplain or a fellow leader can step up to finish. Many units plan for this and it is okay to ask.
Is it okay to read the eulogy from my phone
Yes but practice with it first. Many people prefer printed cards because phones can lock or ring. Turn off notifications anyway and check screen brightness if the event is outdoors in daylight.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.