Writing a eulogy for your tío can feel heavy and necessary all at once. Whether your tío was the family joker who made every party louder or the quiet presence who fixed things without asking for thanks, this guide helps you craft a speech that feels true. You will find plain language advice, culturally sensitive notes, several real style examples, and fill in the blank templates you can copy and make your own. We also explain terms you might see so nothing feels confusing in the middle of grief.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- Terms you might see and what they mean
- How long should a eulogy for your tío be
- Before you start writing
- Structure that actually works
- Writing the opening
- How to write the life sketch
- Anecdotes that actually land
- Addressing bilingual and cultural considerations
- Using humor the right way
- What to avoid when speaking
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Tender and practical, three to four minutes
- Example 2: Short, modern, less than two minutes
- Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
- Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor
- Fill in the blank templates
- Delivery tips that actually work
- When you want to cry while reading
- How to include readings, poems, prayers, and music
- Logistics and who to tell
- Recording and sharing the eulogy
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone asked to speak about their tío at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, graveside service, or online tribute. Maybe he was your favorite grocery shopping partner, your first teacher of jokes, or someone you loved from a complicated distance. This guide works if you want to be funny, tender, short, or deep. There are examples for English, Spanish or mixed language speeches and scripts for different family dynamics.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a short speech that honors the person who has died. It usually appears as part of a funeral or memorial service. A eulogy is not the same as an obituary. An obituary is a written notice with basic facts like birth date, survivors, and service information. A eulogy is personal. It tells a story and shares memory. It can be messy and still be right.
Terms you might see and what they mean
- Obituary A published notice about a death that usually includes biographical details and funeral arrangements.
- Order of service The schedule for a funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers. Think of it as the event program.
- Funeral director The professional who helps coordinate the service, the logistics, and sometimes the ceremony itself.
- Padrino or madrina Spanish for godfather or godmother. In family contexts these words indicate a respected role that may matter during a ceremony.
- Celebration of life An alternative to a traditional funeral that often focuses on stories, photos, and a less formal tone.
- Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice can be provided at home or in a facility.
- RSVP This stands for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used when the family or venue wants to know who will attend.
How long should a eulogy for your tío be
Short and clear is better than long and vague. Aim for three to seven minutes. That usually translates to about 400 to 800 spoken words. If you are nervous about crying or if multiple people are speaking, keep it on the shorter side. A focused two minute tribute often lands harder than a rambling ten minute speech.
Before you start writing
Preparation helps calm nerves and keeps the eulogy useful for listeners. Here is a quick plan to follow.
- Check time and place Ask the family or officiant how long you may speak and whether the service will be formal or casual.
- Decide the tone Do you want to be funny, solemn, celebratory, or a mix? If your tío loved a joke at every chance, humor can honor him. If your family is grieving deeply, a quieter tone may fit better.
- Gather material Collect nicknames, quick stories, favorite sayings, and small habits. Ask siblings, cousins, or close friends for one memory each.
- Pick two or three main points Choose a small number of things you want people to remember. Two or three focus points keep the speech organized and memorable.
Structure that actually works
Use a simple shape that gives you permission to be human and gives listeners something to hold on to.
- Opening Say who you are and your relationship to your tío. Offer one line that sets the tone.
- Life sketch Give a brief overview of his life using roles like brother, uncle, son, or friend. Avoid reciting a resume.
- Anecdotes Tell one or two short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and sensory.
- Legacy or lesson Sum up what he taught you or what you think people will miss.
- Closing Finish with a goodbye line, a short quote, a small action like lighting a candle, or an invitation to share memories after the service.
Writing the opening
The opening is the easiest place to settle nerves. Do not overcomplicate it. Start with your name and relationship then say one short true sentence about him.
Opening examples
- Hi, I am Carlos and I am Miguel s nephew. My tío could fix almost anything and he fixed me when I needed a laugh.
- Hello everyone. I am Rosa and I am the niece who borrowed his best coffee mug and never returned it. Today we remember how he made every kitchen feel like ours.
- Good afternoon. I am Dani and I am his niece. Tío Ramon loved loud music and jalapeños on everything. He taught me how to be bold about life.
How to write the life sketch
The life sketch is a snapshot not a biography. Pick the facts that help your story. Focus on roles and habits that mattered to family life. Dates are optional.
Life sketch templates
- [Name] was born in [place]. He worked as a [job] and later spent his time [hobby or role]. He was a brother, an uncle, and a friend to many.
- [Name] moved to [place] in [life stage]. He loved [hobby], made the best [dish], and always greeted you with [habit].
Anecdotes that actually land
Stories stick in memory more than lists. A good anecdote has a short setup, a small action, and a clear reason it matters. Keep them under a minute each when possible.
Short anecdote examples
- The first time I learned to fish he said the fish bite for people with messy hair or with a sandwich that smells like cheese. We caught only one fish but we laughed the whole day.
- He had a rule for family dinners. If you arrived empty handed you had to sing a song. My uncle loved terrible performances and he encouraged us anyway.
- Whenever my car broke down he showed up with a tarp, a flashlight, and a way of making the moment feel smaller and manageable.
Addressing bilingual and cultural considerations
If your family mixes Spanish and English use what feels right to the room. Small Spanish phrases can land warmly. If you use a Spanish saying translate it afterward for those who do not understand. Honor cultural practices by checking with elders about anything formal like prayers, rosary, or readings.
Examples of bilingual lines
- Mi tío siempre decía, la familia primero which means family comes first. He lived that way every day.
- He loved to say vamos a comer which really meant come over now and bring dessert with you.
Using humor the right way
Humor feels like permission to breathe in a heavy room. Use small earned humor that shows who he was. Avoid jokes that single out someone present or that would embarrass the deceased or family. Test a joke on someone you trust before the service.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Safe humor examples
- He believed every party needed music and at least one song that everyone hated because it meant we all danced anyway.
- Tío Luis taught me that tools are universal. He would use a wrench to fix a chair and also to fix a broken mood.
What to avoid when speaking
- Avoid turning the eulogy into a public family argument. This is not the place for old fights.
- Avoid private gossip or details that embarrass people present.
- Avoid long lists of achievements without stories to make them human.
- Avoid cliches unless you immediately follow them with a real detail that explains why it is true.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
These complete examples follow the structure above. Replace bracketed text with your details. Each one is written to be read aloud and to feel conversational.
Example 1: Tender and practical, three to four minutes
Hi, I am Ana. I am his niece. My tío Manuel had the kind of laugh that shook the kitchen and the kind of hands that could make anything work again. He was born in Puebla and moved here when he was young. He worked as a mechanic for most of his life and in retirement he grew tomatoes that tasted like summer even in winter.
One small memory that shows him was the time my car stalled on the highway. He arrived with a toolbox and a sandwich. He fixed the car and then taught me how to check the oil. He did not let me drive away until I could at least read the dipstick. He taught me patience and self respect in the same breath.
He loved family dinners, loud opinionated soccer matches, and telling stories about when things were harder. He also loved saying buen provecho before every meal. We will miss the sound of his laugh, the way he welcomed you into his home, and his steady presence. Thank you for being here and for holding his memory with us.
Example 2: Short, modern, less than two minutes
Hello, I am Mateo and I am his nephew. Tío Jorge loved bad puns, perfect empanadas, and a shirt with a history of too many stains. He taught me to be curious, to ask for help, and to share your dessert. I will miss his advice and his weirdly precise life hacks. Thanks for being here for him and for us.
Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
My name is Lucia. My relationship with my tío Raul was not simple. We had years of distance after tough arguments. In the last few years we began to speak and to sit together. He apologized once for something he had not realized was his fault and I forgave him. That small moment of repair mattered more than I expected. He taught me that people can change and that time can make space for new gratitude. I carry that with me now.
Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor
Hi everyone. I am Diego, his nephew. If you knew my tío you know two things about him. One he danced like no one was watching and two he thought he was a grill master who could also fix the Wi Fi. He brought music and snacks to every gathering and he insisted on the most dramatic toast. Today we celebrate his loud laugh, his generous plate, and the way he turned every ordinary day into a small party. Grab a plate and tell a story after these words because that is what he would want.
Fill in the blank templates
Use these templates to build your own speech. Fill the blanks then read it out loud and edit for voice and flow.
Template A: Classic short
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Hi, my name is [Your Name]. I am [tío s name] [nephew niece]. [Tío s name] was born in [place]. He worked as [job] and loved [hobby]. One memory that shows who he was is [brief story]. He taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here.
Template B: Bilingual and warm
Hola, soy [Your Name]. My tío [Name] always said, [short Spanish phrase] which means [translation]. He loved [hobby], he was the person you called when [small habit]. Mi tío showed me how to [lesson], and I will carry that forward. Gracias por estar aquí.
Template C: For complicated relationships
My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [tío s name] had its difficulties. We did not always understand each other. Over time we found a quieter place and shared some important conversations. If I could say one thing to him now it would be [line you want to say]. I am grateful for what we learned together.
Delivery tips that actually work
- Print your speech Use large font. Paper is easier to handle when emotions run high.
- Use cue cards Small cards with a single line each help you keep a steady pace and make pauses easier.
- Mark pauses Put a marker where you plan to breathe or wait for laughter. Pauses let the audience feel the moment.
- Practice out loud Read to a friend, to the mirror, or to a plant. Practice helps your voice and throat know the words.
- Bring tissues Or a handkerchief. If you need a second, take it. People will wait and the room is forgiving.
- Ask for help If you think you might not finish, arrange for a trusted person to introduce you and to be ready to finish a line if needed.
- Mic technique Keep the microphone a few inches from your mouth and speak slowly and clearly. If there is no mic project to the back row.
When you want to cry while reading
It is okay to cry. Pause, take a breath, look at your notes, and continue when you can. If your voice breaks, slow down. Fewer words said slowly are often more powerful than many words said quickly. Remember the audience is there to support you.
How to include readings, poems, prayers, and music
Short works work best. A two to four line poem excerpt or a short prayer is often more effective than a long piece. If you include Spanish prayers or a rosary, check with the officiant and family ahead of time. Place music where it supports the speech such as before or after your remarks.
Logistics and who to tell
- Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or if you plan to hand out printed copies.
- Check with the officiant where you will stand and the time limit.
- Give a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service so they can include it in a program or memory book if desired.
Recording and sharing the eulogy
Ask permission before posting a recording online. Some families want privacy. If sharing is approved, add a short note about where people can donate if donations are being collected and how others can share memories privately.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
- Obituary A written notice announcing a death and usually including service details.
- Order of service The plan for the funeral listing the sequence of events.
- Funeral director The person who coordinates the logistics and the service arrangements.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering focusing on stories and photos.
- Padrino madrina Godfather or godmother in Spanish. These roles may be meaningful during religious or cultural rituals.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort for people nearing the end of life. Care can be at home or in a facility.
- RSVP An acronym asking guests to confirm attendance. It stands for respond s il vous plait which is French for please respond.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous
Begin with your name and relationship to your tío. A short opening like Hola, soy [Your Name] and I am his niece gives the audience context and gives you a simple line to steady your voice. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It acts as an anchor when you begin.
What if I forget my place or need a break
Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you need a moment take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue you can ask a designated family member or friend to finish a sentence or two. Planning a backup person ahead of time makes this easier.
Can I include Spanish phrases
Yes. Use the language your family uses. If you include Spanish phrases translate them for people who do not understand so everyone stays connected. Small bilingual touches often feel warm and authentic.
Should I use humor in a eulogy
Yes you can. Small, real, earned humor often breaks tension and brings smiles. Avoid jokes that might embarrass people present or that could feel cruel. Follow a joke with something sincere to restore emotional balance.
How long should I practice
Practice at least three times out loud. One practice should be done in front of a trusted friend or family member who can give quick feedback on tone and timing. Practicing reduces surprises and helps you find the natural rhythm of the speech.
Do I need to give a copy to the funeral home
Yes it is helpful. Providing a copy to the funeral director or to the person running the service helps them stay on schedule and makes it possible to include the text in programs or memory books.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.