Writing a eulogy for your sissy can feel like trying to hold a thousand tiny memories in one breath. Whether sissy means your sister, your chosen sister, or the person who called you their sissy, this guide walks you through how to pull together a speech that feels honest, warm, and doable. You will get simple structure, relatable examples, fill in the blank templates, and practical tips for delivery. We explain any terms or acronyms you might see and give multiple example short scripts you can adapt.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- How long should a eulogy be
- Before you start writing
- Structure that actually works
- Writing the opening
- How to write the life sketch
- Anecdotes that actually land
- Short anecdotes you can use
- Addressing complicated relationships
- Using humor the right way
- What to avoid in a eulogy for your sissy
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Tender sister eulogy three to four minute version
- Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
- Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
- Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor and warmth
- Fill in the blank templates
- Practical tips for delivery
- When you want to cry while reading
- How to include readings music and photos
- Logistics and who to tell
- After the eulogy
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone asked to speak about their sister or sister figure at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, or graveside service. Maybe you are the sibling who can tell stories without turning it into a confessional. Maybe you are the youngest and never spoke in public before. Maybe your relationship was messy and you want to be honest without hurting people. There are examples for gentle, funny, complicated, and very short needs.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a short speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor and remember the person who has died. It is personal and story based. It is not the same as an obituary. An obituary is a written announcement that usually lists facts like birth date, surviving relatives, and service details. A eulogy is allowed to be imperfect. It is a memory offered to others.
Terms you might see
- Obituary A published notice about a death that includes biographical facts and service information.
- Order of service The program that lists the sequence of readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person who helps carry the casket. Often close friends or family members.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that usually focuses on stories, photos, and music.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can happen at home or in a facility.
- RSVP Short for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. Used on invitations to ask guests to confirm attendance.
How long should a eulogy be
Short and focused usually works best. Aim for three to seven minutes. That is roughly four hundred to eight hundred spoken words. If you are nervous, a shorter heartfelt speech tends to be more powerful than a long list of facts. If many people are speaking, check with the family or officiant on time limits.
Before you start writing
Do this quick prep and writing will go much faster.
- Ask about time Confirm how long you are expected to speak and where you fit in the order of service.
- Decide the tone Do you want to be tender, funny, celebratory, or direct? Check with close family so the tone fits the event.
- Gather memories Collect a few short stories, nicknames, favorite songs, and small habits. Ask siblings or friends for one memory each.
- Pick two or three focus points Choose the few things you want people to remember about your sissy. Two or three items give shape to the speech.
Structure that actually works
Use a simple shape and you will feel permission as you speak.
- Opening Say who you are and why you are speaking. Give a one sentence signpost for the tone.
- Life sketch A short overview of her life in plain strokes. Focus on roles and what mattered, not a resume.
- Anecdotes One or two short stories that reveal her personality. Keep them specific and sensory.
- Lessons and traits Sum up what she taught you or what people will miss.
- Closing Offer a goodbye line, a favorite quote, or an invitation to remember her in a small actionable way like lighting a candle or sharing a memory after the service.
Writing the opening
Keep the opening simple. Start with your name and your relationship. Then add one clear sentence about why you are standing there.
Opening examples
- Hello everyone, I am Maya and I am Jess s big sister. Today we are here to remember the way she made us laugh even when we did not want to.
- Hi, I am Marco. I had the honor of calling Pri my sissy. She taught me how to cook a perfect omelet and how to forgive myself when I messed up the pan.
- Hello, I am Toni, her chosen family. We all knew her as the person who brought extra snacks and extra grace.
How to write the life sketch
A life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that matter for your story. Mention roles like sister, partner, artist, teacher, or beloved neighbor. Dates are optional. The goal is to give context and a sense of who she was.
Life sketch templates
- [Name] grew up in [place] and later lived in [city]. She worked as [job or passion]. She was a daughter, a sister, a friend, and someone who always knew the best playlist for a rainy day.
- [Name] loved [hobby], had a knack for [quirky talent], and never missed a chance to send a text that said I am thinking about you. She taught us to notice small beautiful things.
Anecdotes that actually land
Stories are what people remember. Pick one or two short anecdotes with a setup, a small action, and a brief sentence that explains why it matters. Keep them specific. Avoid inside jokes that exclude everyone else.
Example anecdote prompts you can use
- A time she fixed something in a clever way and refused to accept help because she liked the challenge.
- A bad hair day story that turned into a road trip memory with the windows down and the radio loud.
- A late night phone call where she listened without judgement and then made coffee like it was a cure for everything.
Short anecdotes you can use
- When we were teens she taught me how to braid my hair while we argued about which band was better. She always won the argument and the braid looked perfect.
- She once tried to grow tomatoes on a balcony and named each plant. We still eat those tomatoes in recipes that taste like summer and perseverance.
- On Sunday mornings she would walk two blocks with a bag of pastries and hand one to anyone who looked lonely. She had a small way of fixing big quietness.
Addressing complicated relationships
Not every sibling relationship is easy. You can be honest and still be respectful. Acknowledge conflict if that is part of your truth. Keep it brief and focus on what you learned or how things changed. You do not need to settle everything in public.
Example lines for complex relationships
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
- Our relationship was messy at times. We argued about stupid things and later we figured out what mattered. I am grateful for the times we made up.
- She could be stubborn and blunt. Those traits tested me and later taught me to be clearer about my own boundaries.
- We did not always say I love you. In the end we found ways to show it. That is what I will hold on to now.
Using humor the right way
Humor is a permission to breathe. Use small earned jokes that reveal character. Avoid anything that might embarrass or single out someone in the room. Test your jokes on a trusted friend and follow humor with a sincere line to bring the tone back.
Safe humor examples
- She had a rule about shoes in the house. Everyone learned that rule the same week they learned patience and creative hiding spots.
- If she cooked for you it meant she liked you. If she microwaved something it meant she really liked you.
What to avoid in a eulogy for your sissy
- Avoid long lists of achievements with no stories. People connect to memory not to resumes.
- Avoid airing private grievances that will hurt those who are grieving in the room.
- Avoid unfiltered insults. You can be honest about flaws without being cruel.
- Avoid cliches unless you immediately follow them with a specific example that proves the line true.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
Below are complete drafts you can copy and personalize. Replace bracketed text with your details and speak them in your own voice.
Example 1: Tender sister eulogy three to four minute version
Hello. I am Leah, her little sister. Standing here feels impossible and also right. Sissy was the person who made every holiday feel like a secret club where everyone was welcome.
She grew up in a tiny house with a loud kitchen. She worked as a teacher and later ran community workshops where she taught people to read their favorite poems out loud. Her students said she made words feel like warm bread.
One small story that captures her is the way she saved matchbooks from coffee shops. She said it was ridiculous but also useful. When someone needed a light or a laugh she would reach into her bag and hand over a matchbook with a doodle on it. It was her way of saying I am here for you without making a fuss.
She taught me to notice small mercy, to text back even when tired, and to forgive my own mistakes. We will miss the sound of her laugh and the way she rearranged sofas to make room for more people. Thank you for being here and for holding her memory with us.
Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
Hi, I am Cody. I am her brother. My sissy loved bad coffee and great playlists. She had a talent for putting the right song on at the right exact second. She made us all feel like we were in a music video together. I will miss her mixtapes and her stubborn kindness. Thank you for coming and for sharing your memories with us.
Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
My name is Noor. My relationship with Sara was complicated. We fought over petty things and we forgave each other for bigger things. In the last months we found a quiet way to be together. She said things she had been holding and I said things back that needed to be said. It was not perfect but it felt like peace. I am grateful for that time and for the woman she was even when she was difficult. Thank you, Sissy.
Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor and warmth
Hello, I am Ben. If you met my sister you probably noticed three things. One, she loved plants more than people sometimes. Two, she had a collection of mismatched mugs that she defended like they were rare art. Three, she could make a meal from literally whatever was in the fridge. Today we remember her messy kitchen, her clumsy hugs, and her absolute refusal to watch a movie without snacks. Please laugh with us now as we remember her loud beautiful life.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Fill in the blank templates
Pick a template and fill in the brackets. Read it out loud and trim anything that feels forced. Keep font large and bring a backup copy to the service.
Template A: Classic short
My name is [Your Name]. I am [Sibling role like older sister younger brother]. [Name] was born in [place or year]. She loved [hobby], she worked as [job or passion], and she was the person we called when [small habit]. One memory that shows who she was is [brief story]. She taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here.
Template B: For complicated relationships
My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Name] was not simple. We argued about [small example]. Over time I learned [something positive]. In the last [months years] we [reconciled found peace shared small joys]. If I could say one thing to her now it would be [short line you want to say].
Template C: Funny and sincere
Hi, I am [Your Name]. To know [Name] was to know that [quirky habit]. She also made sure we learned [practical skill]. My favorite memory is [funny short story]. She made us laugh and she made us better at [small life task]. I will miss her jokes and the way she folded towels like it was a competitive sport. Thank you for being here and for celebrating her with us.
Practical tips for delivery
Speaking while grieving is hard. Use these practical tactics to stay steady.
- Print your speech Use large font. Paper is often easier to handle than a small device when emotions run high.
- Use cue cards Index cards with a few lines on each reduce the chance of losing your place.
- Mark pauses Note where you want to breathe or where the audience may laugh. Pauses give space and are powerful.
- Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend or to yourself. Familiarity helps your voice when the room is heavy.
- Bring tissues and water Keep both within reach. Swallow, breathe, and keep going when you can.
- Plan a backup If you think you may not finish, arrange a friend to introduce you and to finish a final sentence if needed.
- Mic technique If there is a microphone, hold it a few inches from your mouth and speak at a normal volume. If no mic, project slowly and clearly to the back row.
When you want to cry while reading
If you cry, that is okay. Pause, breathe, look at your notes, and continue when you can. If your voice breaks slow down and keep speaking slowly. Saying fewer words carefully is often more moving than rushing. The room will understand.
How to include readings music and photos
Short readings or poems work best. Pick a two to four line excerpt instead of a whole long poem. For music choose songs that mattered to her and keep them brief. If you plan to show photos, check with the venue about timing and file types. Confirm all choices with the officiant first.
Logistics and who to tell
- Tell the funeral director if you will need a microphone or if you want to hand out printed copies.
- Confirm with the officiant where you will stand and how long you may speak.
- Share a copy with the person running the order of service so they can include it in the program if desired.
After the eulogy
People will likely want a copy. Offer to email it or print a short version for those who ask. Some families request that the text be included in a memory book or in the printed program. You can also record audio and share privately if the family agrees. Recordings can be a comfort for those who could not attend.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
- Obituary A written notice that announces a death and lists service details and biographical information.
- Order of service The schedule for the funeral or memorial that lists readings music and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories and photos.
- Hospice Care aimed at comfort for someone nearing the end of life.
- RSVP Please respond. Used on invitations to confirm attendance.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous
Begin with your name and relationship to your sissy. A short opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [Name] sibling gives you a moment to breathe and grounds the audience. Practice that opening until it feels familiar so it steadies you at the microphone.
What if I forget my place or cannot continue
Pause and breathe. Look at your notes and find your next cue. If you cannot continue have a friend or family member ready to step in. You can also shorten what you planned and say a few sincere lines instead. People will understand.
Should I include religious language if the family is not religious
Only if it mattered to your sissy or to the family. If religion was not central choose secular language that honors memory and values instead. A short poem or song line can work well as an alternative.
Can I use humor in a eulogy
Yes. Small earned humor can give breath to the room. Use stories that reveal character. Avoid jokes that might embarrass or exclude anyone in the audience. Follow humor with a sincere line to keep the tone balanced.
How long should my eulogy be
Three to seven minutes is a common target. That usually fits one to two short stories and a closing. If multiple people are speaking coordinate times so the service stays on schedule.
Should I give a copy of the eulogy to the funeral home or officiant
Yes. Providing a copy helps the officiant keep the service on time and makes it easy to include the text in programs or memory books.
Is it okay to record and share the eulogy online
Check with family first. Some families prefer privacy. If sharing is approved add a short note about who to contact for recordings or donations and be mindful of the wishes of close relatives.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.