Saying a few words for your Pawpaw can feel overwhelming and important at the same time. Your Pawpaw likely held a unique place in your life. You want to honor him, share memories that matter, and speak in a way that feels true to who he was. This guide gives you a straightforward structure, practical writing tips, and ready to use examples you can adapt. We explain any terms you might not know and include short scripts for different tones so you can pick what fits your family.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- How long should a eulogy for your Pawpaw be
- Before you start writing
- Structure that works
- How to write the opening
- Writing the life sketch
- Anecdotes that land
- Using humor for Pawpaw
- When the relationship was complicated
- What to avoid in a eulogy for Pawpaw
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Short and tender three to four minutes
- Example 2: Light and funny with sincerity under two minutes
- Example 3: Honest and respectful for a complicated bond
- Example 4: Veteran tribute with warmth
- Fill in the blank templates
- Delivery tips that actually help
- What to do if you cry while reading
- Including readings and music
- Practical logistics
- After the eulogy
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone asked to speak about their Pawpaw at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, graveside service, or family gathering. Maybe you were the grandchild who visited the most. Maybe you live far away and want to capture a memory that will land with family who are grieving. Maybe your Pawpaw was funny, strict, tender, or complicated. Whatever your relationship, there is a script and a structure here that can help you get words on the page and feel steady at the microphone.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a speech delivered at a funeral or memorial to honor a person who has died. It is personal, not an all inclusive biography. It is a story or a set of stories that help listeners remember who the person was. A eulogy is different from an obituary. An obituary is a short written notice that gives factual details like birth and death dates, survivors, and service information. A eulogy is about memory and feeling.
Terms you might see
- Obituary A published notice that announces a death and usually includes basic biographical facts and service details.
- Order of service The program for the funeral or memorial that lists the sequence of readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person who helps carry the casket. Pallbearers are often close family or friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories, photos, and memory rather than ritual.
- Hospice A care approach that focuses on comfort for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can take place at home or in a facility.
- DOB and DOD Abbreviations for date of birth and date of death. Use full dates in the obituary, but in a eulogy you can skip specifics unless they matter for the story.
- RSVP Short for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It appears on invitations when hosts need a guest count.
How long should a eulogy for your Pawpaw be
Short and focused is often better than long and rambling. Aim for three to six minutes. That usually equals about 400 to 700 spoken words. If multiple people are speaking, check with the family or officiant about time limits. A tightly written three minute speech can be more powerful than a ten minute one that loses shape.
Before you start writing
Preparation reduces stress. Use this quick checklist before you write a single sentence.
- Ask about time Confirm how long you are expected to speak and where your remarks fit in the order of service.
- Decide the tone Do you want to be funny, tender, solemn, or a mix? Check with close family so your tone feels appropriate.
- Collect memories Ask siblings, cousins, or friends for one memory each. A few short stories are better than a long list of facts.
- Pick two or three focus points Choose a few traits or stories you want people to leave remembering. Two or three things are easy to hold in one speech.
- Check logistics Confirm whether there will be a microphone, where you will stand, and whether you can bring printed notes.
Structure that works
A clear structure gives you permission to be short and honest. Use this simple shape.
- Opening Say who you are and why you are speaking. Offer one short sentence that sets the tone.
- Life sketch Give a brief overview of your Pawpaw s life in plain strokes. Focus on roles like husband, father, grandparent, veteran, craftsman, or community member.
- Anecdotes Tell one to three short stories that reveal his character. Keep them specific and sensory.
- Lessons and traits Sum up the values he passed on or what people will miss.
- Closing Offer a goodbye line, a short quote, or an invitation for attendees to share a memory after the service.
How to write the opening
Do not overthink the opening. Start with your name and relationship. Then say one clear sentence about your Pawpaw that gives the audience a sense of him.
Opening examples
- Hello. I am Maya. I am Pawpaw s oldest granddaughter. He taught me how to whistle through a blade of grass and how to fix anything with tape and patience.
- Hi everyone. I am Jamal. Pawpaw was my coach for life. He loved slow coffee, loud country music, and telling the same fishing story until it sounded brand new.
- Good afternoon. I am Eli. Pawpaw made sure every family meal had extra biscuits and extra jokes. Today we remember him and his small generous ways.
Writing the life sketch
The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that support the story you want to tell. Use plain language. Dates are optional. Emphasize roles that shaped him and you.
Life sketch templates
- [Name] was born in [place] and grew up learning [craft hobby or habit]. He worked as a [job] and later built a garden that fed neighbors as well as family.
- [Name] married [partner] and together they raised [number] children. He served in [military branch] and kept the photos and stories close to his heart.
Anecdotes that land
People remember moments more than statements. Choose short stories with a clear setup and a small payoff. Sensory detail helps. One good line that explains why the story matters will make the anecdote stick.
Examples of short anecdotes
- Every Sunday Pawpaw made biscuits. He would stand at the counter, flour on his knuckles, and hum the same tune. If you were late he would save you a biscuit with extra jam.
- He had a rule about tools. If you borrowed one you returned it sharp and clean. One summer I learned to clean a saw by watching him, and he taught me that respect shows up in the small things.
- At board games he played like it mattered but he laughed when he lost. He taught us that winning is fun and losing is fine as long as you laughed afterward.
Using humor for Pawpaw
Humor can be a breath in a heavy room. Keep jokes earned and kind. A quick, true joke often lands better than a long comedic story. Test a line with a cousin or friend before you bring it to the service.
Safe humor examples
- Pawpaw kept a drawer labeled odds and ends that was mostly screws and old batteries. We never found the thing we were looking for. He called it his mystery box and he guarded it like treasure.
- He would fall asleep anywhere. Family gatherings had a secret game of who could nap closer to him without being noticed. He always won by snoring politely.
When the relationship was complicated
Not every relationship with a grandparent is simple. You can be honest and respectful at the same time. Acknowledge complexity without public airing of private hurts. Focus on specific lessons or one honest moment of connection.
Examples for complex relationships
- Our relationship was not always easy. We argued about plans and about how proud looked. In the end we found moments of quiet understanding. I am grateful for those small reconciliations.
- He could be stubborn and set in his ways. He also taught me the value of standing by your word. Those lessons were hard then and useful now.
What to avoid in a eulogy for Pawpaw
- Avoid turning the speech into a family fight or therapy session.
- Avoid long lists of accomplishments without stories to make them human.
- Avoid gossip or private family issues that will cause pain to listeners.
- Avoid cliches unless you immediately back them up with a specific detail.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
Below are complete examples you can personalize. Replace bracketed text with your details. Each example follows the structure above. Read them out loud and edit until they sound like you.
Example 1: Short and tender three to four minutes
Hi. I am Ava and I am one of Pawpaw s grandchildren. Pawpaw grew up on a farm and worked as a mechanic for most of his life. He had hands that smelled like oil and a laugh that filled a room.
One memory that captures him is the way he taught us to fish. He did not rush us. He tied the bait, showed us how to cast, and then sat back with a thermos of coffee while we learned. He taught patience by giving it generously.
He loved family dinners more than anything. He made sure there was always an extra seat at the table and a second helping for anyone who needed it. He was quietly generous and deeply present.
We will miss his stories and the way he made ordinary Sundays feel like a small adventure. Thank you for being here and for holding him in your memory with us.
Example 2: Light and funny with sincerity under two minutes
Hello. I am Tyler and Pawpaw was my partner in grilled cheese engineering. He believed every sandwich could be better with more butter and a secret flipping technique. He also believed in showing up. If you needed help he was there, even if it was to teach you how to fix a squeaky hinge.
He made us laugh and he fixed our broken things. We will miss his jokes, his wheels of wisdom, and his terrible puns. Please laugh with us as we remember him the way he would have wanted.
Example 3: Honest and respectful for a complicated bond
My name is Jordan. Pawpaw and I did not always see eye to eye. We argued about football and about who got which car keys. Over time we found a rhythm. In his last year he told me a story about his own father and said he was proud of the person I was becoming.
Those words meant more than I can say. He taught me that people can change and that forgiveness is often a small daily choice. I am grateful for the time we had. Thank you for sharing this memory with us.
Example 4: Veteran tribute with warmth
Good afternoon. I am Sofia and Pawpaw served in the [military branch]. He kept his uniform carefully and told stories about the friends he met overseas. He returned with a quiet seriousness and a love of fixing radios and telling jokes that only slightly made sense.
He taught us to respect sacrifice and to keep joy in the small moments. Today we remember his service, his humor, and his steady presence. Thank you for honoring him with us.
Fill in the blank templates
Use these templates as a foundation and then edit until they sound like your voice. Speak them out loud while you revise.
Template A: Classic short
My name is [Your Name]. I am [Pawpaw s name] grandchild. [Pawpaw s name] loved [hobby], worked as [job], and could always be counted on to [small habit]. One memory that shows who he was is [brief story]. He taught me [value]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.
Template B: For complicated relationships
My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Pawpaw s name] was complicated. We did not always understand each other. We argued about [small example]. Over time I learned to appreciate [something positive]. If I could say one thing to him now it would be [short line you want to say].
Template C: Light and funny with heart
Hi. I am [Your Name]. To know [Pawpaw s name] was to know [quirky habit]. He also taught us [practical skill]. My favorite memory is [short funny story]. He made us laugh and he made our lives easier. Thank you.
Delivery tips that actually help
- Print your speech Use large font. Printed paper is easier to handle than a small phone screen when you are emotional.
- Use cue cards Index cards with one or two lines on each card help you stay on track and reduce the chance of losing your place.
- Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or expect laughter. Pauses give you a second to collect yourself.
- Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend, to your dog, or into your phone. Recording yourself helps you notice pacing and tone.
- Bring tissues Or a handkerchief. If you pause, breathe, drink a sip of water, and continue. People will wait.
- Arrange a backup If you think you might need help, ask someone to introduce you and be ready to step in if you cannot finish.
- Mic technique Keep the microphone a few inches from your mouth and speak clearly. If there is no mic, slow down and project to the back.
What to do if you cry while reading
Tears are normal. Pause, breathe, look at your notes, and continue when you can. If your voice breaks, slow down. Saying fewer words more slowly can be more powerful. If you cannot continue, have a trusted person ready to finish the final line.
Including readings and music
Short readings work best. A poem excerpt of two to four lines can be meaningful. If including a song, pick music your Pawpaw loved and keep it brief. Check with the officiant before playing recorded music or having someone perform live.
Practical logistics
- Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or a place to stand.
- Confirm the time slot with the officiant and stick to it.
- Provide a copy of your speech to the person running the service so it can be printed in a program or added to a memory book.
After the eulogy
People often ask for a copy. Offer to email it to family and friends. Some families place the text in a memory book or on a private memorial page. Recording the reading can be a comfort for relatives who could not attend. Ask permission before posting any recording online.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Eulogy A personal speech at a funeral or memorial that honors the person who has died.
- Obituary A short written notice announcing a death with basic facts and service details.
- Order of service The schedule for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to help carry the casket. Usually family or close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal event focused on stories, photos, and memory.
- Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life.
- DOB Date of birth. Use full dates in written notices, but only if they matter in your speech.
- DOD Date of death. This is often included in obituaries and printed memorials.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous
Begin with your name and your relationship to Pawpaw. A simple opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [Pawpaw s name] grandchild gives the audience context and buys you a breath to settle. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It will steady you at the microphone.
What if I forget my place or start crying
Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you need a moment, take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue, ask a designated family member to finish for you. Having a short note that someone else can pick up makes this easier.
How do I balance humor and respect
Use small earned jokes rooted in real memories. Avoid anything that could embarrass the deceased or upset family members. Follow a joke with a sincere line to reconnect the tone.
Can I read the eulogy from my phone
Yes you can, but make sure the screen is bright enough for the venue and that the device will not ring. Many people prefer printed notes or index cards because they are easier to handle when emotions run high.
Should I include religious language if the family is not religious
Only if it matters to Pawpaw or to the family. If religion was not central, choose secular language that honors values and memories instead. You can include a short poem or quote that matches the family s beliefs.
How long should a eulogy for Pawpaw be
Three to six minutes is a good target. Short and focused speeches are often more memorable. Coordinate times if multiple people are speaking so the service stays on schedule.