How to Write a Eulogy for Your Papa - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Writing a eulogy for your papa can feel impossible while also being one of the most important things you will do. Whether papa means dad or grandfather in your family, this guide gives clear steps, real examples, and simple templates you can use right now. We break down terms you might not know and include delivery tips that actually help when emotions are raw. Pick a template, personalize it, and get ready to tell a true story about a life you loved.

Who this guide is for

This article is for anyone who has been asked to speak about their papa at a funeral, memorial, graveside service, or celebration of life. Maybe you are the oldest child, maybe you were the one who lived closest, or maybe you were chosen because you can talk without turning it into a family argument. Maybe your relationship was complicated. That is okay. There are scripts here for short needs, for funny papas, for hardworking dads, and for grandparents who lived large in small ways.

What is a eulogy

A eulogy is a short speech that honors a person who has died. It usually appears as part of a funeral or memorial service. A eulogy is not the same thing as an obituary. An obituary is a written notice that gives basic facts like birth date, survivors, and service details. A eulogy is personal. It tells a story about who your papa was and why he mattered.

Terms you might see

• Obituary A public notice about a death that usually includes biographical details and service information.
• Order of service The sequence for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
• Pallbearer A person who helps carry the casket. Pallbearers are usually close family or friends.
• Celebration of life A less formal event that focuses on stories, photos, and memories rather than ritual.
• Hospice An approach to care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can be provided at home or in a facility.
• RSVP Abbreviation for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.

How long should a eulogy be

Short and clear beats long and wandering. Aim for three to seven minutes of spoken time. That is about four hundred to eight hundred words. If you are worried about crying or going off track, shorter is usually better. A tight three minute speech can be more meaningful than a rambling ten minute one.

Before you start writing

Getting a little organized makes everything easier. Use this quick plan.

• Ask about time Check with the family or officiant about how long you can speak and where your eulogy fits in the order of service.
• Decide the tone Do you want a solemn tribute, a celebration, some humor, or a mix? Check with close family if you are unsure.
• Gather stories Ask siblings, cousins, or friends for one memory each. Small stories beat lists of awards every time.
• Pick three focus points Choose three things you want people to remember about your papa. Three points give your speech structure and make it easier to write and deliver.
• Choose your opening and closing A clear opening gives you breathing room. A short closing gives audience members something to hold on to.

Structure that works

Simple structure gives you permission to be human and keeps listeners with you. Use this shape.

• Opening Say who you are and your relationship to papa. Offer one sentence that sets the tone.
• Life sketch Give a short overview of his life. Focus on roles like son, veteran, father, or gardener rather than a full CV.
• Anecdotes Tell one or two short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and brief.
• Lessons and traits Summarize the values he passed on or the things people will miss.
• Closing Offer a goodbye line, a short quote, or invite people to share a memory or light a candle.

How to write the opening

The opening sets a gentle pace. Start with your name and relationship. Then say one clear sentence that explains why you are speaking and what you will say.

Opening examples

• Hello everyone. My name is Miguel and I am Juan s son. Today we are here to remember how he made every backyard feel like a place for stories and barbecue smoke.
• Hi. I am Tia. Papa was my grandfather and my friend. I want to share two short stories that show how he loved loud music and quiet mornings equally.
• Good afternoon. I m Alex, his daughter. Dad taught me how to fix a bike and how to say sorry without making excuses.

How to write the life sketch

The life sketch is a brief map of the important things. It is not a chronological biography. Pick the facts that matter for your story. Mention jobs, hometowns, and the roles he played that shaped his life and yours.

Life sketch templates

• [Name] was born in [place]. He worked for many years as a [job]. He was a son, a brother, a papa to [names or count], and later a proud grandfather.
• [Name] moved to [city] when he was young. He loved [hobby] and was known for [habit]. He married [spouse] and together they raised a family who learned how to [small lesson].

Anecdotes that matter

Stories make a eulogy live. Choose one or two short, sensory memories with a clear payoff. A good story has a setup, a moment, and a line that explains why it matters.

Example anecdotes

• When I was six he taught me to fish by telling me it was okay to sit quietly. He said you do not always need to say something to be present. That idea stuck with me.
• He had a rule that every Sunday morning started with coffee and a crossword. If you tried to sneak the paper he would pretend to glare and then let you take the answers. He loved the tradition more than the puzzle.
• Papa could fix anything with duct tape and a stubborn look. The bench on our front porch survived three kids and one dog because of him.

Addressing complicated relationships

Not every relationship with a papa is simple. If your relationship was strained you can still speak honestly and with dignity. You do not need to air private grievances. Focus on truth and what you learned or how you found closure.

Examples for complicated relationships

• My relationship with my father was not easy. We had distance for many years. In the last months we sat and traded small stories and for me that felt like a kind of peace.
• He could be sharp and blunt. He also showed up when it mattered most. I am grateful for that care even when it was messy.
• We had words we never said. Saying one thank you today is enough for me. That last thank you is for him and for what he gave me even when we did not agree.

Using humor the right way

Humor can feel like permission to breathe. Use gentle, earned jokes that the audience can recognize. Avoid anything that might embarrass family members or single someone out. A short laugh followed by a sincere line works well.

Safe humor examples

• Papa believed in naps at any hour. If you heard snoring in the living room you knew it was a certified papa approved rest period.
• He refused to give up old shoes. He called them his sentimental sneakers and they had more patches than new seams. We teased him and he stole our socks anyway.

What to avoid in a eulogy

• Avoid turning the eulogy into a family therapy hour or a place to settle scores.
• Avoid gossip or private stories that could hurt people present.
• Avoid long lists of achievements without stories that make them human.
• Avoid clichés unless you follow them with a specific detail that makes the line true.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Below are complete examples to copy and personalize. Replace bracketed text with your details. Each follows the structure above.

Example 1: Papa who worked hard and loved quietly, 3 to 4 minute version

Hello. I am Marco and I am his son. My papa, Luis, was born in a small town where everyone knew everyone. He moved here for work and built a life by the sweat of his brow and the smell of his coffee. He worked as a mechanic for over thirty years. He could fix engines and he could fix our broken toys without asking for thanks.

One small story that captures him is about the old truck. He kept that truck for twenty years because he said it reminded him of when he first arrived with nothing but a toolbox and a suitcase. When my sister got a flat tire on a rainy night he drove across town with two flashlights and a thermos of coffee and would not leave until the tire was fixed. He taught us how to show up by doing it quietly.

He taught us to work hard, to be consistent, and to laugh at our own mistakes. We will miss his steady hands and the way he hummed while he cooked. I am grateful for his love and for the small, ordinary ways he made our lives better. Thank you for being here and for sharing your stories with our family.

Example 2: Funny grandpa, short and sweet

Hi. I am Jess, his granddaughter. Papa loved two things, bad jokes and extra pickles. If you ever needed a laugh you went to his chair. He had a rule about movie snacks, which was always more is better. He made us laugh until soda came out of our noses and then he would wink like he had won a prize. We will miss his jokes and his generous spirit. Thank you for celebrating him with us today.

Example 3: Immigrant papa who built a new life, honest and proud

My name is Omar. Papa came here with hope and a single suitcase. He learned a new language by listening to the radio and never complained when things were hard. He worked nights, studied by streetlight, and always made sure we had the opportunities he did not. He taught me that courage can be quiet. He taught me to say yes to second chances. Today we remember his bravery and the life he made for our family.

Example 4: Complicated relationship, respectful and real

I am Hannah. My father was a complicated man. He made mistakes and he loved in ways that were sometimes hard to understand. In recent years we spoke more and shared memories of small things like how he fixed a leaky faucet or how he would dance in the kitchen at three in the morning. I did not always agree with him. I did learn from him. Today I am grateful for those late night dances and the final conversations that brought us closer. Thank you, Dad.

Example 5: Very short modern eulogy under two minutes

Hi everyone. I m Leo, his son. Papa loved Sunday grilling, loud music, and long naps. He taught me how to fold a fitted sheet which is apparently a life skill. He was our constant. Thank you for being here and for holding him in your memory.

Fill in the blank templates

Fill in the blanks and then edit until it sounds like you. Read it out loud and trim anything that feels forced.

Template A: Classic short

My name is [Your Name]. I am [Papa s name] [son daughter grandchild]. [Papa s name] was born in [place]. He worked as [job] and loved [hobby]. One memory that shows the kind of person he was is [brief story]. He taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.

Template B: For complicated relationships

My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Papa s name] was complicated. We had distance and disagreements but we also had moments of closeness. One thing I learned from him is [lesson]. In the last [months years] we [reconciled talked often found peace]. If I could say one thing now it would be [short line you want to say].

Template C: Light and funny with sincerity

Hi. I am [Your Name]. To know [Papa s name] was to know that [quirky habit]. He also made sure we learned how to [practical skill]. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. He made us laugh and he made us feel like home. I will miss his jokes and his terrible dance moves. Thank you.

Practical tips for delivery

Speaking while grieving is hard. These tactics help you stay steady and clear.

• Print your speech Use large font. Paper is easier to handle than a phone when emotions are high.
• Use cue cards Index cards with key lines reduce the chance of losing your place.
• Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or expect laughter. Pauses give you time to regroup.
• Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend or to an empty room. Practicing tells your throat what to expect.
• Bring tissues and water Keep a tissue and a bottle of water nearby. Small comforts help.
• Ask for backup If you think you might not get through it have a friend or family member ready to step in and finish a sentence if needed.
• Microphone tips Keep the mic a few inches from your mouth and speak at a normal pace. If there is no microphone speak slowly and project to the back row.

What to do if you cry while reading

If tears come that is okay. Pause. Breathe. Look down at your notes. Slow down and continue when you can. If you cannot continue ask the person who introduced you to step in. The room will understand. Saying fewer words more slowly is often more powerful than pushing through too fast.

How to include readings, poems, and music

Short readings work best. If you include a poem pick a two to four line excerpt rather than a long poem. Readings can be religious or secular. Confirm the officiant is comfortable with the piece and consider printing the text in the program.

Music choices

• Choose songs your papa loved or ones that match the tone of the event.
• If live music is not possible ask the venue about playing a recorded track between speakers.
• Keep music short and place it where it supports the speech such as before the eulogy or as a brief interlude after a key moment.

Logistics and who to tell

• Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or if you plan to hand out printed copies.
• Confirm with the officiant where you will stand and how long you may speak.
• Give a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service so they can include it in the program or memory book.

After the eulogy

People will likely ask for a copy. Offer to email it to family and friends. Some families want the text in the printed program or in a memory book. You can also record the audio and share it privately. A recording can be a comfort to those who could not attend.

Recording the eulogy and sharing it

Ask the family before posting a recording online. Some families prefer privacy. If sharing is approved add a short note about where any donations should go or how people can share their memories with the family. Respect the wishes of those closest to the deceased.

Checklist before you step up to speak

• Confirm your time limit with the family or officiant.
• Print your speech with large font and bring a backup copy.
• Practice at least three times out loud.
• Mark pauses and emotional beats in your copy.
• Bring tissues and a glass or bottle of water if allowed.
• Tell a family member you might need a moment and arrange a small signal if you want them to finish a line if needed.

Glossary of useful terms and acronyms

• Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
• Obituary A written notice that announces a death and usually includes service details.
• Order of service The plan for the funeral or memorial listing the sequence of events.
• Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket. They are usually family or close friends.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering that often focuses on stories and photos rather than rituals.
• Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can take place at home or in a facility.
• RSVP Abbreviation for respond s il vous plait which means please respond. Used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.
• Power of attorney A legal document that gives someone authority to act on another person s behalf. If you hear POA that usually refers to this legal arrangement.

Frequently asked questions

How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous

Start with your name and your relationship to papa. A short opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [Papa s Name] child gives the audience context and buys you a breath to settle. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It will steady you at the microphone.

What if I forget my place or start crying

Pause. Breathe. Look at your notes. If you need a moment take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue have a designated person ready to step in. Keeping your remarks short makes this easier.

Should I include religious language if the family is not religious

Only if it was meaningful to your papa or to close family. If religion was not central choose secular language that honors memories and values instead. A poem or a short reading that fits the family s beliefs can be a good alternative.

How do I balance humor and respect

Use humor that is rooted in a real story and that includes the audience. Avoid jokes that single someone out or that might embarrass the deceased. Follow a joke with a sincere line to bring the tone back to tribute.

Can I read the eulogy from my phone

Yes you can but make sure the screen is bright enough and that the device will not ring. Many people prefer paper or index cards because they are easier to handle when emotions are high.

How long should a eulogy be

Aim for three to seven minutes. Short speeches tend to be more memorable. Coordinate with other speakers so the service stays on schedule.

Is it okay to record and share the eulogy online

Ask the family first. Some families want privacy. If sharing is approved provide a short note about the context and any donation information if that is relevant.