Saying a few words about your Nana can feel like carrying both grief and gratitude at the same time. You want to honor her, show who she was, and keep your voice steady. This guide walks you through writing something honest and memorable. We explain terms you might not know and give ready to use examples and templates you can adapt. Read through, pick a sample, and start drafting with confidence.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- How long should a eulogy for your Nana be
- Before you start writing
- Structure that works
- How to choose what to include
- Writing the opening
- How to write the life sketch
- Anecdotes that feel like Nana
- Addressing complicated or mixed relationships
- Using humor the right way
- What to avoid in a eulogy for your Nana
- Complete eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Warm and steady, three to four minute version
- Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
- Example 3: Funny and loving celebration of life
- Example 4: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
- Fill in the blank templates
- Practical tips for delivery
- What to do if you get too emotional
- Including poems, readings, and music
- Logistics and who to tell
- After the eulogy
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone who has been asked to speak about their grandmother at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, graveside service, or small family gathering. Maybe you were the obvious choice because you lived closest to her, or maybe you are the one who can tell the best stories without turning them into a therapy hour. Maybe your relationship was messy. That is okay. There are examples for tender, funny, short, and complicated situations.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a short speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who died. It differs from an obituary. An obituary is a written notice that gives basic facts like dates and service details. A eulogy is personal. It is a story. It does not have to be perfect.
Terms you might see
- Obituary A published notice that announces a death and usually includes service information and basic biography.
- Order of service The plan for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket. They are usually family or close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories, photos, and connection rather than rituals.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can happen at home or in a facility.
- Wake A time for family and friends to gather before or after a funeral to share memories and condolences.
- RSVP Short for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.
- ICU Stands for intensive care unit. It is a hospital unit for people who need constant medical attention.
How long should a eulogy for your Nana be
Short and clear is better than long and rambling. Aim for three to five minutes. That is roughly 400 to 700 spoken words. If you are nervous about crying, a shorter heartfelt tribute can be more powerful than a long speech that loses focus.
Before you start writing
Preparation makes everything easier. Use this quick plan.
- Ask the family or officiant about time Confirm how long you should speak and where your eulogy fits in the order of service.
- Decide the tone Do you want it to be tender, celebratory, funny, or a mix? Check with family so the tone fits the crowd and Nana s personality.
- Gather material Collect nicknames, habits, favorite sayings, small stories, and any details that feel true. Ask siblings, cousins, or close friends for one memory each.
- Pick three focus points Choose three main things you want listeners to remember. Three keeps your speech shaped and memorable.
Structure that works
A simple structure gives you permission to be human. Use this shape.
- Opening Say your name and your relationship to Nana. Offer one sentence that sets the tone.
- Life sketch Give a quick overview of her life in practical strokes. Focus on roles like daughter, sister, seamstress, gardener, or church member.
- Anecdotes Tell one or two short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and sensory.
- Lessons and traits Summarize the values she passed on or the small things people will miss.
- Closing Offer a goodbye line, a short poem line, or invite the room to a small ritual such as lighting a candle.
How to choose what to include
It is tempting to list every lovely thing Nana did. Resist that urge. Pick the details that show who she was. Think about what she did more than what she owned. Stories beat lists. One good story can say more than ten facts.
Questions to help you pick material
- What did Nana always say when you were leaving her house?
- What was her favorite meal or snack?
- Was there a routine she followed that became a family ritual?
- What is a small habit that makes you think of her instantly?
- What did she teach you that you still use?
Writing the opening
The opening should be simple and grounding. Start with your name and relationship. Then offer a single true sentence about Nana. That first sentence helps calm you and gives the audience context.
Opening examples you can borrow
- Hello, I am Jess. I am Nana s granddaughter. She always greeted us like we were the best part of her day.
- Hi everyone. My name is Omar. I am Nana s eldest grandson. She could make a full meal from two eggs and a smile.
- Good afternoon. I am Claire. I am Nana s daughter. She called my phone every Sunday just to say I love you.
How to write the life sketch
The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that matter for the story you want to tell. Use plain language. Focus on the roles that shaped her life and yours.
Life sketch templates
- [Name] was born in [place] in [year]. She worked as a [job] and later became known for [hobby or role]. She loved [simple joy] and was a mother to [names or count].
- [Name] moved to [city] when she was [age or life stage]. She planted every window box and never missed a family birthday. She was the person we could call at midnight and know she would answer.
Anecdotes that feel like Nana
Stories make the speech stick. Keep anecdotes short, sensory, and with a small payoff. A good story has a setup, an action, and a line that explains why it matters.
Short anecdote examples
- Every Saturday Nana made pancakes and she refused to flip them until she had sung the pancake song. We got syrup everywhere but she said food tastes better when you laugh first.
- When I was awkward at school she taught me to stand tall by having me practice a superhero pose with her in the kitchen. She said the pose does not fix everything but it helps you try.
- She kept a jar of buttons and whenever you hugged her she would pick a bright one and pin it to your shirt as a way to say you are special today.
Addressing complicated or mixed relationships
Not every relationship with a grandmother is uncomplicated. If your relationship had tension you can be honest without being hurtful. Acknowledge complexity and highlight any growth or closure. You do not need to air grievances in public. Aim for dignity.
Examples for complicated relationships
- We did not always see eye to eye. She had strong opinions and I had my own. Over the last years we found a quieter way to be together and for that I am grateful.
- She could be tough. She also taught me to be tough in ways that helped me survive hard times. That is a gift I carry forward.
- Our relationship was not perfect. Still, she loved me in the ways she knew how and that mattered.
Using humor the right way
Humor can be a breath in a heavy room. Use small, earned jokes not shock value. Test them on someone who will be honest. Avoid jokes that single out people or make the deceased look mean. Follow a joke with a sincere line to reconnect the tone.
Safe humorous examples
- Nana had two modes, gentle and sharper than lemon. If you arrived late she would clap like a traffic cop and then make you a sandwich the size of a small country.
- She believed every holiday needed extra pudding. If you left hungry it was your own fault.
What to avoid in a eulogy for your Nana
- Avoid turning the speech into a family argument.
- Avoid long lists of achievements without stories to make them human.
- Avoid private details that could hurt people in the room.
- Avoid cliches unless you immediately give a specific detail that makes the phrase true.
Complete eulogy examples you can adapt
Below are full examples you can personalize. Replace bracketed text with your details. Read them aloud and edit to make them feel natural for your voice.
Example 1: Warm and steady, three to four minute version
Hello, my name is Priya and I am Nana s granddaughter. Nana liked to tell people that if you added salt to a cake it made everything taste like a hug. That was her way of saying small details matter. She was born in Leicester and moved here when she was young. She worked as a seamstress and later ran a small stall at the market where she would sell aprons and stories in equal measure.
One small memory that captures her is how she greeted every visitor with a cup of tea and a question. She did not wait for stories to arrive. She asked questions until memories spilled out. That practice taught me how to listen and how asking twice can be a kindness. She also had a laugh that sounded like someone dropping a handful of marbles and then deciding everything was fine.
She taught me to be patient with slow recipes and with people who needed time to show up. I will miss the cups of tea, the mended shirts, and the way she made you feel expected at her table. Thank you for coming and for holding her memory with us.
Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
Hi everyone. I am Jamal, Nana s oldest grandson. Nana loved crossword puzzles, early morning walks, and she wore bright scarves like armor. She taught me to be curious and to always say thank you to the bus driver. We will miss her laugh and her tenacious belief that there is always room for one more at the table. Thank you for being here.
Example 3: Funny and loving celebration of life
Hello. I am Maria, her daughter. If you ever visited Nana you quickly learned two rules. Rule one is arrive with an empty stomach. Rule two is never call her on a Monday unless you want life advice that starts with a recipe. She had a recipe for everything including for surviving heartbreak which, according to her, required chocolate and a long nap. We will miss her food and her rules and we will honor her by having an extra slice of pie today.
Example 4: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
My name is Sam. Nana and I did not always understand each other. She could be blunt and I could be sensitive. Over the last few years we found middle ground in quiet phone calls and in sharing a radio show together. Those small things mattered to both of us more than either of us expected. I am grateful for the chance to have known her and to have learned from her stubborn kindness.
Fill in the blank templates
Use these templates to build your own. Fill the blanks and then edit to make the voice yours. Read out loud and trim anything that feels forced.
Template A: Classic short
My name is [Your Name]. I am [Nana s name] [grandchild child]. [Nana s name] was born in [place or year]. She loved [one hobby], she worked as [job], and she was the person we called when [small task or habit]. One memory that shows who she was is [brief story]. She taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.
Template B: For complicated relationships
My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Nana s name] was complicated. We did not always agree about [small example]. Over time I came to appreciate [something positive]. In the last [months years] we [reconciled spoke often found peace]. If I could say one thing to her now it would be [short line you want to say].
Template C: Light and funny with sincerity
Hi, I am [Your Name]. To know [Nana s name] was to know that [quirky habit]. She also made sure we learned [practical life skill]. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. Even her jokes had work to do. She made us laugh and she made us better at [small household chore]. I will miss her [fun trait]. Thank you.
Practical tips for delivery
Speaking while grieving is hard. These practical tactics help you stay steady.
- Print your speech Use large font and double spacing. Paper is easier to handle if emotions run high.
- Use cue cards Small index cards with one or two lines on each are easy to manage and reduce the chance of losing your place.
- Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or where the audience will laugh. Pauses give you time to regroup.
- Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend, to a mirror, or to your dog. Practice tells your throat what to expect.
- Bring tissues Or a handkerchief. If your voice breaks, slow down and breathe. The room will wait.
- Ask for a helper Arrange for someone to introduce you or to stand by in case you need a moment. That can be a huge relief.
- Mind the mic Keep the microphone a few inches from your mouth and speak slowly. If there is no mic, project to the back row.
What to do if you get too emotional
If tears come, that is normal. Pause, take a breath, sip water, and look at your notes. If you cannot continue, have a designated person ready to step in. Many people keep their remarks short and let someone else finish a final thought if needed. Remember that showing emotion is allowed. It connects you to the room.
Including poems, readings, and music
Short excerpts work best. If you pick a poem, choose a line or two rather than a long piece. Readings can be religious or secular. Confirm the officiant is comfortable with the choice. If you include music, ask the venue about playing a recorded track or about a live musician. Place music where it supports the speech such as a brief interlude after a story.
Logistics and who to tell
- Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or if you plan to hand out printed copies.
- Confirm with the officiant where you will stand and how long you may speak.
- Give a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service in case they want to include it in the program or memory book.
After the eulogy
People may ask for a copy. Offer to email the text to family and friends. Some families include the eulogy in a printed program or a memory book. You can also record the audio and share it privately with people who could not attend. Always ask permission before posting anything online.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
- Obituary A written notice that announces a death and usually includes service details.
- Order of service The plan that lists the sequence of readings, music, and speakers at a service.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket. They are typically family or close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that often focuses on stories and photos rather than rituals.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. It can occur at home or in a facility.
- Wake A time for family and friends to gather before or after the funeral to share memories and condolences.
- RSVP Short for respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It asks invitees to confirm attendance.
- ICU Stands for intensive care unit, the hospital unit for patients who need constant monitoring.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous
Begin with your name and your relationship to Nana. A short opening like Hello, I am [Your Name] and I am Nana s [grandchild child] gives the audience context and buys you a breath to settle. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It will steady you at the microphone.
What if I forget my place or start crying
Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you need a moment take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue, ask a designated family member or friend to finish for you. Having a short line that someone else can pick up makes transitions easier.
Can I include humor in a eulogy for my Nana
Yes. Small earned jokes are often welcome. Use humor that comes from real memories and that does not embarrass anyone present. Follow a joke with a sincere line to reconnect the tone.
How much personal detail is too much
Avoid private family matters that could hurt people in the room. Keep personal detail to what helps listeners understand who Nana was and how she mattered. Think about what she would want shared.
Should I read from my phone
You can, but make sure the screen is bright enough and that the device will not ring. Many people prefer printed paper or index cards because they are easier to handle when emotions run high.
How long should a eulogy be
Three to five minutes is a good target. If multiple people are speaking coordinate times so the service stays on schedule.
Is it okay to record and share the eulogy online
Ask the family first. Some families want privacy. If sharing is approved, include a short note about where any donations should go or how people can send their condolences.