How to Write a Eulogy for Your My Boy - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Saying goodbye to your boy is one of the hardest things you will do. You want to honor who he was, hold a room of people, and get through a speech without feeling like you are failing at grief. This guide gives a clear structure, practical writing steps, and real eulogy examples you can adapt. We explain any funeral words you might see and give templates for toddlers, teens, and adult sons. Read through, pick a template, and start drafting with less pressure.

Who this guide is for

This article is for anyone asked to speak about a boy you loved and cared for. That could mean your son, a stepson, an adopted child, a young friend you called your boy, a partner known by that nickname, or even a beloved pet called boy. We cover short and long formats and scripts for complicated relationships and sudden losses. If you are grieving and need a practical way to organize your thoughts this is for you.

What do we mean by my boy

People use the phrase my boy in different ways. Most commonly it refers to a son. It can also be an endearing way to describe a younger man in your life or a close friend who was known by that name. In this guide we use my boy to mean any male loved one you will speak about. If your situation is unique replace wording in templates so it is authentic to your relationship.

Key funeral terms you might see

• Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who died. It is personal and story based.
• Obituary A written notice announcing a death with basic facts and service details. An obituary is not a eulogy.
• Order of service The schedule for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
• Pallbearer Someone chosen to carry the casket. These people are usually family or close friends.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering focusing on memories, photos, and stories.
• Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life near the end of life. Hospice can happen at home or in a facility.
• Open casket When the casket is open during the service to allow viewing. Check with family and funeral staff before referencing this in a eulogy.

How long should a eulogy for your boy be

Aim for two to five minutes for most services. That usually equals about 300 to 700 spoken words. If multiple people are speaking confirm time limits so the program fits the venue. Short and specific is better than long and rambling. If you are nervous think about a meaningful three minute story and a short closing line.

Before you start writing

Take a few practical steps to make writing less painful.

• Ask the family or officiant about time Confirm how long you can speak and where your words will fit in the order of service.
• Choose the tone Decide if this will be solemn, celebratory, funny, or a mix. Check in with close family so the tone matches the person who died.
• Collect memories Ask a sibling, close friend, or partner for one memory each. Small stories help more than a list of facts.
• Pick three focus points Choose three things you want people to remember about him. Three points give your speech structure and make it easier to draft.

Structure that actually works

Use this simple, reliable shape for your speech. It keeps you focused and helps listeners follow along.

• Opening Say your name and your relationship to the boy. Offer one clear sentence about why you are speaking.
• Life sketch Give a short overview of who he was. Hit roles and traits not every job detail.
• Anecdotes Tell one or two specific stories that reveal character. Keep them short and sensory.
• Lessons or traits Summarize what he taught people or what they will miss.
• Closing Offer a goodbye line, a quote, a poem excerpt, or a brief call to action like lighting a candle or sharing a favorite memory with someone near you.

Choosing what to say about different ages

How you speak about a toddler is different from how you speak about an adult son. Below are tips for common scenarios.

Toddler or young child

• Keep it short and gentle.
• Focus on small moments like favorite games songs or the way they smiled when you entered the room.
• A simple image often carries more weight than a long list of accomplishments.

Teenager

• Offer honest reflection about their personality and growth.
• Include a story that shows what made them unique whether it was a stubborn streak a creative habit or a knack for kindness.
• Acknowledge the things they were still becoming if that feels true and respectful.

Adult son

• Lean into whole life moments like relationships work passions causes and small domestic details that show who he was at home.
• If the relationship was complicated you can be honest and still keep the tone respectful.
• Give space for the achievements but center the human details that make a person feel alive on the page.

How to write the opening

The opening should be simple and anchoring. Say your name and relationship then add one sentence that sets the tone. Practice the opening until it feels steady in your mouth.

Opening examples

• Hello everyone. My name is Jenna and I am Luke s mom. We are here to remember the loud laugh and impossible socks he loved.
• Good afternoon. I am Marco. I was Tom s stepdad for twelve years. I am honored to say a few words about the young man who taught me how to cook pasta properly.
• Hi. I am Shay. I called him my boy because that was what made sense between us. Today I want to share three small things to remember him by.

Writing the life sketch

The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick facts that support the story you are telling. Avoid reading a long list of jobs or awards without a story that makes them human.

Life sketch templates

• [Name] was born in [place or year]. He loved [interest], worked as [job] and spent his free time [hobby]. He was a son, a friend and for many of us someone who laughed loudly and held us up when we needed it.
• [Name] grew up in [place]. He had a habit of [quirk] and a talent for [skill]. He cared deeply about [cause] and showed up for the people he loved.

Anecdotes that stick

Short vivid stories make a eulogy feel true. Aim for one sentence of set up one sentence of action and a one sentence payoff that explains why the moment mattered.

Example anecdotes

• When he was seven he taught himself to fix a bike with nothing but a YouTube video and a stubborn jaw. He loved solving things even if that meant asking awkward questions to get to the answer.
• On Sundays he made pancakes shaped like animals no matter how messy they were. Those pancakes became our family trademark and a reason to gather.
• He could make friends with anyone in a minute. At a funeral once someone I did not know hugged me and said he had once helped them move while whistling. That felt like him perfectly.

Addressing complicated relationships

If your relationship was strained you do not need to hide that. You can speak honestly without airing private grievances. Name the complexity and then offer something you learned or a small moment of reconciliation.

Examples for complicated relationships

• Our relationship was not simple. We argued and we lost time. In the last months we found a quieter place where we could laugh about small things. I am grateful for that time.
• He could be hardheaded and stubborn. He was also the first person to hold my hand in a hospital room and the one who left little notes on my fridge. That contradiction is what made him human.

Using humor the right way

Humor can be healing. Use small gentle jokes that are earned by the story you tell. Avoid anything that might embarrass the deceased or single out a family member. After a funny line bring it back to something sincere so the audience can move with you emotionally.

Safe humor examples

• He had two speeds for getting ready slow and slower. If you wanted to be on time you had to leave an hour early which we never did and which is probably why most of our good stories are late stories.
• He refused to buy curtains because apparently sunlight was a personality trait. Our apartment had a unique glare forever and we loved it for him.

What to avoid in a eulogy

• Do not air heated family disputes or private business matters.
• Do not read an exhaustive resume without stories to make the achievements human.
• Avoid making the speech about your own loss only. This day is to honor the person who died.
• Avoid gratuitous shock value or inappropriate jokes.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Here are ready to use examples for different tones and ages. Replace bracketed text with your details and read aloud to see how it sounds.

Example 1: Short and tender for a young child

Hello everyone. I am Maya. He was my boy Liam. Liam loved dinosaurs and bedtime songs that he insisted we sing in silly voices. When he smiled the whole room felt lighter. He taught us that small hands can hold entire hearts. Today I will miss his bedtime dance and the way he named every bug in the garden like they were old friends. Thank you for holding him with us today.

Example 2: Honest and steady for a teenage son

Hi. I am Aaron. This is hard and I will be brief because he was a minimalist and hated long speeches. Noah loved music and drawing and had a way of saying exactly what he meant even if it was blunt. He once stayed up overnight to finish a mural in an alley because he wanted strangers to have something beautiful on their walk to work. That generosity was loud and private all at once. I will miss his weird playlists and the way he challenged me to be braver. Rest easy kiddo.

Example 3: Adult son with humor and warmth

Good afternoon. I am Renee. I am Elliot s mother. Elliot had a list of rules he followed unevenly. Rule one was always leave the last piece of pizza for someone else. Rule two was never trust a plant in his care. He left us teaching and messes and a thousand small moments that are now everything. He volunteered at the animal shelter and took terrible selfies with dogs like he was preparing for a dog influencer career. Elliot loved loudly and left a lot of crumbs of joy behind for us to pick up. Thank you for being here and laughing with us as we remember him.

Example 4: Complicated relationship and reconciliation

My name is Sam. My relationship with Jake was complicated and real. We fought about everything from curfews to career choices and sometimes we forgot to say I love you when it mattered. In recent years we found a lane where we talked more and argued less. I cherish our last phone call when he told me he was proud of the work I was doing and I told him I was proud of him for trying. That felt like closing a circle. I will miss him fiercely and I am thankful for the small repair we made before today.

Fill in the blank templates

Use these templates to jumpstart your writing. Fill in the blanks then personalize with detail and voice.

Template A Classic short

My name is [Your Name]. I am [his name] [mother father guardian friend]. [Name] loved [one interest]. He worked as [job or student status] and he was the person who always [small habit]. One memory that shows who he was is [brief story]. He taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what you and others will miss]. Thank you for being here and holding his memory with us.

Template B For a complicated relationship

My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Name] was not simple. We had our fights about [small example]. Over time we found ways to understand each other and in the last [months years] we had moments of real connection like [small memory]. If I could say one thing to him now it would be [short line you want to say].

Template C Funny warm and short

Hi. I am [Your Name]. To know [Name] was to know [quirky habit]. He also insisted on [life practical skill he forced you to learn]. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. He made us laugh and he made us better at life in odd small ways. I will miss his jokes and his exacting sandwich making. Thank you for sharing in this memory.

Practical tips for delivery

• Print your speech Use large font so you can read without squinting. Paper feels steadier than a phone for many people.
• Use cue cards Small cards with one or two lines each are easy to manage and help you find a place after a pause.
• Mark pauses Note where you expect the audience to react laugh or breathe. Pauses give you space.
• Practice out loud Read to a friend or into your phone. Listening to a recording helps you tighten wording and timing.
• Bring tissues and water Sounds obvious but it matters. A sip of water can calm a choke in the throat.
• Arrange backup If you think you may not finish consider asking someone to introduce you and to be ready to finish the last line if needed.
• Microphone tips Keep the mic a few inches from your mouth and speak slowly. If there is no mic project calmly to the back row and slow your pace.

When you want to cry while reading

Crying is allowed. If tears come pause breathe and look down at your notes. Take a slow breath and continue. If your voice breaks slow your pace and use fewer words. A single honest sentence is powerful. The audience will hold the space for you.

Including readings music and photos

Short readings work best. Pick two to four line excerpts from poems or songs rather than reading a long piece. If you want music ask the venue about playing a short track between speakers. Photos in a slideshow can be shown while someone reads or after your eulogy so that visuals support memory not distract from speech.

Logistics and who to tell

• Tell the funeral director you will be speaking and ask about microphone and podium setup.
• Confirm with the officiant where to stand and how long you can speak.
• Provide a copy of your words to the person running the order of service in case they want to include it in the program or memory book.

After the eulogy

People may ask for a copy of your words. Offer to email it to close friends and family or include it in a memory book. If you record the speech ask permission before posting it online. Some families prefer privacy. If the family approves you can share a short note about how donations or memorial actions can be made in his name.

Glossary of useful terms and acronyms

• Eulogy A spoken tribute at a funeral or memorial that honors the person who died.
• Obituary A written announcement of a death that includes service details and basic biographical information.
• Order of service The schedule for a funeral listing the sequence of events.
• Pallbearer A person chosen to carry or escort the casket. They are usually close friends or family.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering that emphasizes stories photos and remembrance rather than ritual.
• Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life when someone is nearing the end of life. It can be provided at home or in a facility.
• RSVP This is short for a French phrase meaning please respond. It is used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.

Frequently asked questions

How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous

Start with your name and your relationship. A simple line like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [Name] mother father guardian or close friend gives you a breath and grounds the room. Practice that opening so it feels steady when you begin.

What if I forget my place or start crying

Pause take a breath and look at your notes. The audience will wait. If you cannot continue have a predetermined person ready to finish a sentence or offer a short closing line. Practicing this arrangement beforehand reduces anxiety.

Can I include humor

Yes small earned humor is often welcome. Use jokes that come from real memories and follow them with a sincere line. Avoid anything that might embarrass the deceased or upset family members.

Should I use religious language

Only if it was meaningful to the person who died or to the family. If religion was not central use secular language and readings that match the family values. You can include a short poem or song instead of prayer if that feels right.

How long should a eulogy for a boy be

Two to five minutes is a good target for most services. If you are part of a longer program confirm limits with the officiant. Short focused remarks are often more memorable than long speeches.

Is it okay to read from my phone

Yes but be careful about screen brightness and accidental notifications. Many people prefer printed pages or index cards because they feel less likely to slip and are easier to read when emotions are high.