Writing a eulogy for your mamá feels impossible and necessary at the same time. You want to honor her, tell a true story that feels like her, and get through speaking without losing your voice. This guide gives you a clear plan, sample scripts you can adapt, Spanish phrases you might want to use, and delivery tips that actually help. Read through, pick a template, and start shaping something honest and manageable.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- Quick glossary of terms you might see
- How long should a eulogy be
- Before you start writing
- Structure that works
- How to write the opening
- Opening examples
- How to write the life sketch
- Short life sketch templates
- Anecdotes that matter
- Examples of short anecdotes
- Addressing complicated relationships
- Examples for complicated relationships
- Using Spanish phrases and bilingual moments
- Useful Spanish phrases and translations
- How to use humor
- Safe humor examples
- What to avoid
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Tender and short, three to four minutes
- Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
- Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
- Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor
- Fill in the blank templates
- Template A: Classic short
- Template B: For complicated relationships
- Template C: Bilingual and warm
- Practical tips for delivery
- When you want to cry while reading
- Including readings, prayers, or songs
- Logistics and who to tell
- After the eulogy
- Checklist before you speak
- Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This article is for anyone who has been asked to speak about their mamá at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, graveside service, or small family gathering. Maybe you are the child who was closest to her, maybe you are the one who can stand up and talk without turning it into a family argument, or maybe your relationship was complicated. All of that is okay. There are sample scripts for tender phrases, light humor, short tributes, and bilingual moments.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a short speech that honors a person who has died. It usually appears during a funeral or memorial. A eulogy is not an obituary. An obituary is a written notice that lists facts like birth date, survivors, and service details. A eulogy is personal. It tells a story. It can be messy and still be beautiful.
Quick glossary of terms you might see
- Obituary A public notice about a death that often lists service details and basic biographical facts.
- Order of service The plan for the funeral or memorial that lists the sequence of readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person who helps carry the casket. Usually family or very close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories, photos, and shared memories.
- Hospice Care that focuses on comfort for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can happen at home or in a facility.
- RSVP An abbreviation of the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is often on invitations.
How long should a eulogy be
Short and focused is better than long and rambling. Aim for three to seven minutes. That usually equals about four hundred to eight hundred spoken words. If you are nervous about crying, a short sincere tribute will often land harder than a long speech that loses focus.
Before you start writing
Preparation makes everything easier. Use this quick plan before you open a blank document.
- Ask about time Confirm with the family or officiant how long you are expected to speak and where your eulogy fits in the order of service.
- Decide the tone Do you want to be solemn, celebratory, funny, or a mix? Talk to a family member so the tone fits the event and your mamá.
- Gather material Collect nicknames, favorite sayings, one or two short stories, and a few practical facts like jobs or volunteer work. Ask siblings or friends for one memory each.
- Pick three focus points Choose three things you want listeners to remember. Three is small enough to hold and big enough to give shape.
Structure that works
This simple structure keeps you on track and gives the audience something to hold on to.
- Opening Say your name and your relationship to mamá. Offer one line that sets the tone.
- Life sketch Give a brief overview of her life in practical strokes. Focus on roles that mattered like daughter, sister, esposa, madre, friend, or worker.
- Anecdotes Tell one or two short stories that reveal who she was. Keep them specific so listeners can picture the moment.
- Values and lessons Summarize what she taught you or what people will miss.
- Closing Offer a goodbye line, a short poem, a prayer, or a call to action like light a candle or share a memory.
How to write the opening
The opening is where you set the stage. Keep it simple. Say your name, your relationship, and one clear sentence about why you are speaking.
Opening examples
- Hola. I am Ana and I am her daughter. Today we come together to remember how she filled our house with música and arroz con leche.
- Hi everyone. I am Miguel, her son. I want to tell you one thing about my mamá that people always noticed. She never met a stranger and she never left a birthday uncelebrated.
- Hello. I am Lucia. My mamá taught me how to cook, how to say perdon, and how to love loud and messy. I will try to do that justice in these few minutes.
How to write the life sketch
The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that support the story you are telling. Use plain language and avoid listing every job. Think about the roles that shaped her life and yours.
Short life sketch templates
- [Name] was born in [place] and raised in [place]. She worked as a [job] and was known for [trait]. She married [partner] and together they raised [number] children.
- [Name] moved to [city] when she was [life stage]. She loved [hobby], cooked [favorite food], and was always first to volunteer when a neighbor needed help.
Anecdotes that matter
People remember stories not lists. Choose stories that are sensory and have a small payoff. Keep them short. One quick detail can say more than a paragraph of praise.
Examples of short anecdotes
- Every birthday she insisted on writing a small note in Spanish and English so no one felt left out. She would fold it into the cake box like a tiny treasure.
- When I was a kid she taught me to dance by holding my hands and saying one, two, tres. Now I dance when I miss her and I still count the same way.
- She had a rule in the kitchen that anyone who burned the rice had to wash the dishes. We burned rice often and we learned humility and dishwashing skills at the same time.
Addressing complicated relationships
Not all relationships with mamá are simple. If your relationship was strained, you can speak honestly and with dignity. Focus on truth and intention. You do not need to air private grievances in public. Acknowledge difficulty and point to lessons, small reconciliations, or closure.
Examples for complicated relationships
- My mamá and I did not always agree. We had fights that lasted months. In the end we spoke more openly than we had in years. I am grateful for that time.
- She could be tough and blunt. She also taught me to be resilient and to stand up for myself. Those things were not easy to learn. They still matter.
- We made peace in the last year. It was not perfect but it was real. I will carry that with me always.
Using Spanish phrases and bilingual moments
A bilingual element can feel like giving the speech back to mamá. A short Spanish phrase can land deeply. Translate any Spanish lines for guests who do not speak the language. That makes everyone feel included.
Useful Spanish phrases and translations
- Mamá Mom
- Te quiero I love you
- Gracias por todo Thank you for everything
- Descansa en paz Rest in peace
- Siempre en mi corazón Always in my heart
Example of using a phrase in a speech
I want to say one short thing in Spanish because that is how she spoke to us when we were small. Mamá, gracias por todo. She would have rolled her eyes and told me not to be dramatic but she would have loved it.
How to use humor
Humor can be a relief and a bridge. Use small earned jokes that come from real stories. Avoid anything that would embarrass her or single out someone in the audience. A light joke can give people permission to breathe.
Safe humor examples
- She believed in good hair days and good enchiladas in equal measure. If you ever doubted her cooking you had to eat it and then apologize.
- She was convinced our cat understood Spanish and that the cat preferred her arroz. The cat disagreed but the cat also never cooked the rice.
What to avoid
- Avoid turning the eulogy into a family argument or a therapy session.
- Avoid gossip or private details that would hurt people present.
- Avoid long lists of achievements with no stories to make them human.
- Avoid cliches unless you immediately make them specific to her life.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
Below are complete examples you can copy and personalize. Replace bracketed text with your details and practice out loud.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Example 1: Tender and short, three to four minutes
Hola. My name is Rosa and I am Mariana s daughter. Today I want to say thank you for coming and to share one small story that captures who she was.
Mariana was born in Guadalajara and moved to our city in her twenties. She worked in a bakery for many years and then opened a small catering business so she could feed people and make money at the same time. She was the person who always remembered birthdays and who made sure no neighbor went hungry.
One memory I keep is how she sang while she kneaded dough. There was flour on her hands and on her apron and she would hum old songs my abuela taught her. That sound now feels like home. She taught me to work hard and to stop to share a meal with someone who needs it. I will miss her voice, her hands, and the way she taught us that food is a way to say I love you. Gracias Mamá. Please join me in a moment of silence and then in telling one memory of her to someone near you.
Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes
Hi everyone. I am Carlos, her son. Mom loved salsa music, bad jokes, and coffee so strong it could wake the dead. She taught me to dance through everything and to always ask for extra lime. She made our house loud and full of love. Thank you for being here to hold her memory with us.
Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
My name is Elena. My relationship with my mamá was complicated in the best and worst ways. We argued about everything from my hair to my choices. In the last few years we found a new rhythm. We sat on the porch, she told stories I had never heard, and I finally said sorry for things I had not thought I needed to apologize for. I learned to forgive and to ask for help. She taught me to be stubborn and to keep showing up. I will miss her and I am grateful for the chance to have said those hard things out loud before she left.
Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor
Hello. I am Jorge, her eldest. If you met my mamá you know she had two rules. Rule one was be kind. Rule two was if you lied about eating the cookies she made better cookies for the rest of us. She kept emergency cookies in a tin like a superhero keeps a cape. Today we celebrate her stubborn kindness and her imperfect baking. Eat a cookie with us and tell a story. She would have liked that.
Fill in the blank templates
Fill these in and then edit to sound like you. Read them out loud and trim anything that feels forced.
Template A: Classic short
My name is [Your Name]. I am [Mamá s name] [son daughter child]. [Mamá s name] was born in [place]. She worked as a [job] and she loved [hobby or food]. One story that shows who she was is [brief story]. She taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.
Template B: For complicated relationships
My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [Mamá s name] was complicated. We had disagreements about [small example]. Over time I learned [something positive]. In the last [months years] we [reconciled spoke often found peace]. If I could say one thing to her now it would be [short line you want to say].
Template C: Bilingual and warm
Hola. Soy [Your Name]. My mamá, [Mamá s name], had a laugh that filled a room. She also had a stubborn streak that could not be tamed. She taught me to [life skill], to say te quiero often, and to make everyone feel welcome at the table. One memory I will always keep is [brief bilingual story]. Gracias Mamá. We will miss you.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
Practical tips for delivery
Speaking while grieving is hard. These practical tips keep you steady.
- Print your speech Use large font. Paper is less likely to slip and drop when emotions are raw.
- Use cue cards Index cards with one or two lines on each are easy to manage and reduce the chance of losing your place.
- Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or where the audience will laugh. Pauses give you time to regroup.
- Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend, to a mirror, or to your partner. Practice tells your throat what to expect.
- Bring tissues and water Wet eyes are normal. If you need to stop, breathe, swallow, and continue. The audience will wait.
- Arrange for help If you fear you will not get through it, have a friend ready to step in and finish a line if needed.
- Mic technique Keep the microphone a few inches from your mouth and speak at a normal volume. If there is no mic, speak slowly and project to the back row.
When you want to cry while reading
If tears come that is okay. Pause, breathe, look down at your notes, and then continue. Slow down if your voice breaks. Fewer words said slowly are often more powerful. Allow yourself to be human in that room.
Including readings, prayers, or songs
If you include a poem or prayer choose a short excerpt rather than a long piece. If you use Spanish prayers translate a line or two so non Spanish speakers are included. Confirm with the officiant that the piece fits the service. If playing recorded music check with the venue about sound levels and timing.
Logistics and who to tell
- Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or if you want printed copies of your speech.
- Confirm with the officiant where you will stand and how long you may speak.
- Provide a copy of your speech to the person running the program in case they want to include it in the order of service or a memory book.
After the eulogy
People will likely ask for a copy. Offer to email it or to include it in a memory book. Some families request the eulogy be printed in the program or recorded for relatives who could not attend. Ask permission before posting a recording online as some families prefer privacy.
Checklist before you speak
- Confirm your time limit with the family or officiant.
- Print your speech with large font and bring a backup copy.
- Practice at least three times out loud.
- Mark emotional beats in your copy.
- Bring tissues and a small bottle of water if allowed.
- Tell a trusted person you might need them to finish a line and make a tiny signal so they know what to do.
Glossary of useful terms and acronyms
- Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
- Obituary A written notice announcing a death with service details and basic facts.
- Order of service The schedule for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to help carry the casket. Usually family or close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories and photos rather than ritual.
- Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life for someone near the end of life. It can happen at home or in a facility.
- RSVP Short for respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used to ask guests to confirm attendance.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous
Start with your name and your relationship to mamá. A line like Hola, soy [Your Name] y soy su hija gives people context and buys you a breath. Practice that first sentence until it feels familiar. It will steady you when you begin.
What if I forget my place or start crying
Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you need a moment, take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue have a designated person ready to finish for you. A short plan like that reduces panic.
Should I include religious language if the family is not religious
Only include religious language if it was important to your mamá or the family. If religion was not central choose secular words that honor values and memories instead. You can use a short poem or a reading that matches the family s beliefs.
Can I use Spanish in the eulogy
Yes. Short Spanish phrases can feel intimate and authentic. Translate any lines for non Spanish speakers so everyone understands. Using both languages can make the tribute feel like home.
How long should I speak
Aim for three to seven minutes. That is usually enough to tell a few stories and leave a clear impression. Coordinate times if multiple people will speak so the service stays on schedule.
Should I give a copy of the eulogy to the funeral home or officiant
Yes. Providing a copy helps the officiant and the person running the service stay on schedule. It also makes it easy to include the text in the program or a memory book.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.