Saying a few words about your great grandma can feel huge and tiny at the same time. Huge because she likely shaped your family in ways that matter more than anyone else. Tiny because finding the right words feels impossible when so many memories crowd your mind. This guide gives a clear plan, real examples you can adapt, and practical delivery tips that actually help when you are standing at the mic. We explain terms you might not know and give fill in the blank templates you can use right away.
We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.
That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More
Quick Links to Useful Sections
- Who this guide is for
- What is a eulogy
- How long should a eulogy for a great grandma be
- Before you start writing
- A simple structure that works
- How to write the opening
- Writing the life sketch
- Anecdotes that actually matter
- How to handle a complicated relationship
- Using humor the right way for an older loved one
- What to avoid
- Full eulogy examples you can adapt
- Example 1: Heartfelt and short 2 to 3 minutes
- Example 2: Light and funny 90 second version
- Example 3: For a large family with many speakers
- Example 4: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
- Fill in the blank templates
- Practical tips for delivery
- When you start crying
- How to include readings, songs, and photos
- Logistics to confirm
- Sharing the eulogy after the service
- Glossary of useful terms
- Frequently asked questions
Who this guide is for
This is for anyone who has been asked to speak about a great grandma at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, graveside service, or online tribute. Maybe you are a grandchild or great grandchild who wants to honor a matriarch. Maybe you are the one who always tells family stories and now you have to do it out loud. Maybe your relationship was simple or complicated. There are examples for short and long speeches, funny and tender tones, and for situations where you need to keep it brief.
What is a eulogy
A eulogy is a short speech that honors a person who has died. It is a personal reflection delivered at a funeral or memorial. A eulogy is not the same as an obituary. An obituary is a written notice that gives basic facts like birth date, survivors, and service details. A eulogy tells a story. It is allowed to be imperfect.
Terms you might see
- Obituary A published notice about a death that usually includes biographical details and funeral arrangements.
- Order of service The schedule for a funeral or memorial listing the sequence of readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person who helps carry the casket. Pallbearers are often close relatives or friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories, photos, and memories rather than ceremony.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can be provided at home or in a facility.
- RSVP Short for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.
How long should a eulogy for a great grandma be
Less is often more. Aim for three to seven minutes for a typical eulogy. That is about 400 to 800 spoken words. If you are nervous choose the shorter end. If multiple family members are speaking coordinate time so the service stays on schedule. If you were asked to keep it under a specific time confirm that with the officiant or family first.
Before you start writing
Preparation makes the writing process smoother. Follow these steps.
- Ask about time Confirm how long you should speak and where your eulogy fits in the order of service.
- Decide the tone Do you want to be tender, funny, celebratory, or direct and simple? Check with close family so the tone fits.
- Gather memories Talk to siblings, cousins, and older relatives and ask for one story each. Collect nicknames, favorite foods, routines, and habits.
- Pick three focus points Choose three things you want people to remember about your great grandma. Three is small enough to hold and big enough to structure a speech around.
- Choose a delivery format Will you read from paper, use index cards, or read from your phone? Practice with the format you choose.
A simple structure that works
Use a shape that keeps you focused and makes the speech feel intentional.
- Opening Say who you are and your relationship to your great grandma. Offer one sentence that sets the tone.
- Life sketch A brief overview of her life in plain strokes. Focus on roles that mattered like daughter, mother, community volunteer, baker, gardener, or storyteller.
- Anecdotes Tell one to three short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and sensory.
- What she taught us Summarize values or small lessons she passed on.
- Closing A short goodbye line, a poem excerpt, a request to remember one thing, or an invitation to share memories after the service.
How to write the opening
Keep the opening simple. State your name and relationship, then offer one clear sentence about what the day is for.
Opening examples
- Hello, my name is Ava and I am Olivia s great granddaughter. We are here to remember the quiet strength she carried with her like a small bag of essentials.
- Hi everyone, I am Marcus, one of Joe s grandchildren. Today I want to talk about his laugh and how it invited the rest of us to be braver about joy.
- Good afternoon. I am Nia, his great grandson. My great grandma taught me how to make her soup and how to ask for help with a smile.
Writing the life sketch
This is not a full biography. Pick the facts that matter to the story you are telling. Use plain language. Avoid listing every job and date. Focus on roles, habits, and things that made her who she was.
Life sketch templates
- [Name] was born in [place] in [year]. She raised [number] children and later became a beloved great grandma to [number] great grandchildren. She worked as a [job or role] and loved [hobby or activity].
- [Name] moved to [city] when she was [age] and built a life around [family, church, work, or community]. She was known for [quirk or big trait].
Anecdotes that actually matter
People remember a good small story more than a list of accomplishments. A strong anecdote has a setup, a moment, and a takeaway. Keep them short and concrete.
Quick anecdote examples
- Every Sunday she made the same soup and no matter what else happened that week we knew the smell would fix us. Once she taught me to stir slowly and say the names of the people at the table. I still do that when I am nervous.
- She had a secret for folding towels so they looked like little mountains. When guests arrived she would pretend the towels were a trick. We always knew they were love in towel form.
- She kept an emergency jar labeled for coins and kindness. If you needed bus fare or a friend to call she would quietly reach in and hand it over without making a fuss.
How to handle a complicated relationship
Not every relationship with a great grandma is simple. If your relationship was strained you can still speak honestly and with dignity. Acknowledge complexity without airing private grievances. Focus on truth and small reconciliations or lessons.
Examples for complicated relationships
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
- My relationship with my great grandma was not straightforward. We had distance between us for years and then a few afternoons that felt like repairs. I am grateful for those last cups of tea and the quiet understanding we found.
- She could be stubborn and blunt. Those traits were hard at times and they also taught me how to stand up for myself. I carry that with me now and it has helped me more than I expected.
Using humor the right way for an older loved one
Humor can be a gentle breath in a heavy room. Use small, earned jokes that reveal character rather than embarrass. Test the humor with a trusted family member first.
Safe humor examples
- She had three rules. Rule one was bring cookies. Rule two was bring more cookies. Rule three was do not mess with her crossword puzzle. She took both dessert and puzzle time very seriously.
- Her sense of direction was legendary. If you followed her you were guaranteed a scenic route and possibly a new friend by the end of the drive.
What to avoid
- Avoid turning the eulogy into a therapy session or a place for family arguments.
- Avoid gossip or private family disputes that could hurt people present.
- Avoid long lists of facts without stories that make them feel human.
- Avoid clichés unless you immediately connect them to a specific example.
Full eulogy examples you can adapt
Each example below follows the structure above. Replace bracketed text with your own details and practice reading it out loud.
Example 1: Heartfelt and short 2 to 3 minutes
Hello. My name is Sam and I am Lucy s great grandson. Lucy had a way of making a house feel like a home simply by being there. She could make soup that fixed a bad day and tell a story that made you laugh when you thought you could not. She taught me how to braid hair, how to say thank you properly, and how to keep old letters in a shoe box so they do not get lost.
One quick memory is about her garden. She believed plants were people too. If a plant was struggling she would talk to it and then water it slowly. That patience shaped how she treated the people around her. I will miss her steady hands and her steady heart. Please join me in remembering one small kindness she gave you and keep it with you today. Thank you.
Example 2: Light and funny 90 second version
Hi everyone, I am Daniel, one of her great grandchildren. To know Margaret was to know that snacks are a family responsibility. She kept the candy jar full and the advice flowing. She claimed no one could make a better biscuit and she was probably right. She also believed that any problem could be solved with a cup of tea and a good story. We will miss both the tea and the stories. Thank you for being here and for sharing your memories.
Example 3: For a large family with many speakers
Hello, I am Priya, one of her grandchildren. Grandma Rose had a long life and many roles. I will keep this brief because we have several people who want to speak. Rose was a seamstress who taught generations how to mend a hem and how to say sorry when we needed to. She fought for the family, she loved fiercely, and she always saved room for dessert. One small request from her that I hope we keep is that family dinners remain loud and welcoming. Thank you, Grandma, for the patchwork of lessons you left us.
Example 4: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful
My name is Eli. My great grandma Etta was a complicated woman. She could be sharp and distant at times and gentle in other moments. We did not always understand each other. In the last few years we found small ways to connect through a shared love of radio shows and crossword puzzles. I do not have a tidy story of reconciliation to tell, only many afternoons that taught me patience. I am grateful for those afternoons and for the ways she pushed us to be self reliant. Thank you, Grandma.
Fill in the blank templates
Use these templates as a starting point. Fill them in and then edit to make them sound like you.
Template A: Short and classic
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.
My name is [Your Name]. I am [great grandma s name] great [grandson or granddaughter]. [Name] was born in [place or year]. She loved [one hobby], worked as [job or role], and was the person we called when [small task or habit]. One memory that shows who she was is [brief story]. She taught us [value or lesson]. We will miss [what you will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.
Template B: For large families or multiple speakers
Hi, I am [Your Name]. I will keep this short because many family members want to share. [Great grandma s name] loved [food or hobby] and kept a house full of [items or habits]. One small thing she asked for was [request or tradition]. I hope we honor her by keeping that alive. Thank you for being here to remember her with us.
Template C: For a funny but sincere tone
Hello. I am [Your Name]. To know [great grandma s name] was to know that no one left her table hungry and no one left without a piece of advice. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. Even her jokes were practical. She made us laugh and reminded us to be kind. I will miss her and her practical wisdom. Thank you.
Practical tips for delivery
Speaking while grieving is hard. These tactics keep you steady.
- Print your speech Use large font. Paper is easier to hold when tears come.
- Use cue cards Small index cards with one or two lines each keep you from being overwhelmed by a full page of text.
- Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or where a laugh might happen. Pauses give you time to regroup.
- Practice out loud Read the eulogy once or twice to a friend, to a mirror, or into your phone. Practice makes the words feel familiar.
- Bring tissues and water Have a handkerchief and a glass of water if allowed. Small comforts help.
- Arrange a backup If you think you will not be able to finish, ask a family member to be ready to step in.
- Microphone technique Keep the mic a few inches from your mouth and speak at a normal volume. If there is no mic project to the back row and speak slowly.
When you start crying
If you cry, that is normal. Pause, take a breath, look down at your notes, and continue when you can. If you need a moment, take it. The audience will wait. If you cannot continue and there is a backup person, they can pick up from a clear line in your notes.
How to include readings, songs, and photos
Short readings and song excerpts work best. If you include a poem pick a two to four line excerpt rather than reading a very long piece. Photos are great. A single slide or a small album that plays during part of the service gives people time to remember quietly. Confirm with the officiant about timing and technical needs.
Logistics to confirm
- Tell the funeral director if you need a mic, a projector, or printed copies for the program.
- Confirm where you will stand and how long you will speak.
- Provide a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service in case they need it for the program.
- Ask family if they want your words recorded and who will manage the recording if approved.
Sharing the eulogy after the service
People often want a copy. Offer to email the text or add it to a memory book. Some families include the eulogy in the printed program. If you plan to post the recording online ask permission from the family first. Privacy varies by family and culture.
Glossary of useful terms
- Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
- Obituary A written notice that announces a death and usually includes service details and brief biographical information.
- Order of service The plan for the funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
- Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket, usually family or close friends.
- Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories, photos, and memories.
- Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. It can happen at home or in a facility.
- RSVP Abbreviation for respond s il vous plait which asks guests to confirm attendance.
Frequently asked questions
How do I start a eulogy for my great grandma if I am nervous
Begin with your name and your relationship to her. A short opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [great grandma s name] great granddaughter gives the audience context and buys you a breath to settle. Practice that line until it feels familiar. It will steady you when you begin.
What if I forget my place or cannot speak because I am crying
Pause and breathe. Look at your notes or cue cards. If you cannot continue have a designated family member ready to step in. Many people keep their remarks short so someone else can finish if needed.
Should I include religious language if the family is not particularly religious
Only include religious language if it was important to your great grandma or to the family. If religion was not central choose secular words that honor values and memories instead. A short poem or reading can be a good neutral choice.
Can I read the eulogy from my phone
Yes, but make sure the screen will be readable in the venue and that the device will not ring. Many people prefer printed paper or index cards because they are easier to handle when emotions are strong.
How do I balance humor and respect for someone older
Use humor that is rooted in a real, kind memory. Avoid jokes that might embarrass or shame. Follow a humorous line with a sincere sentence to reconnect tone and feeling.
What if my great grandma had a long, interesting life with lots of facts
Pick the few details that best support the theme of your speech. You do not need to include every accomplishment. Choose three focus points that people will remember and illustrate them with short stories.
Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.
You will learn how to:
- Gather memories with simple prompts.
- Shape them into a clear structure.
- Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.
What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.
Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.