How to Write a Eulogy for Your Father - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Writing a eulogy for your father is emotional and necessary at the same time. You want to honor him, tell true stories, and get through the speech without losing your place every few sentences. This guide gives you a clear plan, sample scripts, and fill in the blank templates you can copy and personalize. We explain any terms you might not know and give delivery tips that actually work. Read through, pick a template, and start writing with confidence.

Who this guide is for

This article is for anyone asked to speak about their father at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, or graveside service. Maybe you were the obvious pick because you were the one who lived closest. Maybe you are the person in the family who can stand up and talk without turning everything into therapy. Maybe your relationship was complicated. That is okay. There are sample scripts for short tributes, longer reflections, funny tones, and honest complicated relationships.

What is a eulogy

A eulogy is a short speech that honors someone who has died. It is usually part of a funeral or memorial service. A eulogy is personal and narrative. It is different from an obituary. An obituary is a written notice that lists basic facts like birth date, survivors, and service information. A eulogy is a memory, a few stories, and a perspective about what the person meant to you and to the people in the room.

Terms you might see

• Obituary A written notice about a death that usually includes biographical details and service arrangements.
• Order of service The schedule for a funeral or memorial listing readings, music, and speakers.
• Pallbearer A person chosen to carry the casket during the service.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering that often focuses on stories, photos, and memory sharing.
• Officiant The person leading the service. They may be clergy, a celebrant, or a family friend.
• Hospice Care focused on comfort for people nearing the end of life. Hospice care can happen at home or in a facility.
• RSVP Abbreviation for the French respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used on invitations to ask people to confirm attendance.

How long should a eulogy be

Shorter is usually better. Aim for three to seven minutes. That is roughly 400 to 800 spoken words. If multiple people are speaking, ask the family or officiant what the time limits are. A short, sharp speech often feels more honest than a long one that loses focus.

Before you start writing

Some quick prep makes writing so much easier. Try this checklist before you open a blank document.

• Confirm time and tone Ask the family or officiant how long you should speak and whether the tone should be solemn, celebratory, or a mix.
• Collect memories Ask siblings, close friends, or coworkers for one memory each. One line from multiple people gives you material fast.
• Pick three focus points Choose three things you want people to leave remembering. Three points are easy to hold and give your speech structure.
• Decide your opening Plan one clear opening sentence that identifies you and sets the tone.
• Choose a closing Think of a final line that acts like a goodbye. It can be a quote, a short poem, or a call to action like lighting a candle or sharing a memory.

Structure that actually works

Use this simple shape. It helps the audience follow and it makes writing faster.

• Opening Say who you are and why you are speaking. Offer one sentence that sets the tone.
• Life sketch Give a brief overview of your father's life in practical strokes. Focus on roles like son, father, partner, worker, friend, hobbyist or volunteer.
• Anecdotes Tell one or two short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and sensory.
• Lessons and traits Summarize what people will remember and what he passed on to you.
• Closing Offer a goodbye line, a short poem excerpt, or a simple invitation like join me in thinking of one way he made you laugh.

Writing the opening

Keep your opening simple. Name yourself and your relationship. Then say one true sentence about him. That gives you a steady start and buys you a breath.

Opening examples

• Good morning. My name is Daniel and I am Gregs son. We are here to remember the man who taught us how to change a tire and how to apologize when it mattered.
• Hello everyone. I am Priya. Dad was the kind of person who fixed things with duct tape and kindness. I want to say a few words about what that meant to me.
• Hi. Im Miguel, his daughter. My father loved crossword puzzles, strong coffee, and terrible puns. Thank you for being here to celebrate him.

How to write the life sketch

The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that help the story you are telling. Use plain language and avoid listing every job. Focus on roles that mattered to him and to the people in the room.

Life sketch templates

• [Name] was born in [place] in [year]. He worked as a [job] and later became [job or role]. He was a son, brother, father, and friend to many.
• [Name] moved to [city] when he was [age or life stage]. He loved [hobby], could fix almost anything, and always had room for one more guest at the table.

Anecdotes that land

Stories stick. Pick one or two short memories that show who your father was. Keep each story with a setup, an action, and a short line that explains why it mattered.

Short anecdote examples

• Every Sunday he trimmed the hedge and then pretended it was a sculptural art piece. The neighborhood kids called it the cube yard and we would rearrange the garden gnomes as if they were curators.
• When I failed my driving test he did not lecture me. He drove me to get coffee and told me about the time he flunked a test and how it taught him to be patient with himself.
• He kept a box of pens that all wrote. If someone borrowed a pen it was their duty to return it with a story. We have a shelf full of those returned pens and even more returned stories.

Addressing complicated relationships

Not every father child relationship is simple. If yours was strained you can still speak honestly and with dignity. You do not need to air old grievances. Acknowledge complexity and highlight one truthful lesson or moment of closure.

Examples for complicated relationships

• My relationship with my father was complicated. We had distance for many years. In his last months we managed a few honest conversations that gave me peace. Im grateful for that chance.
• He could be strict and sometimes unkind. He also taught me resilience. Those lessons were hard at the time and useful now.
• We never agreed on music or politics but we both loved the board game he always cheated at. Those small shared things matter.

Using humor the right way

Light humor can be permission to breathe. Keep jokes earned and kind. Avoid anything that embarrasses the deceased or singles out someone in the room.

Safe humor examples

• Dad had two cooking states, burnt and edible. He insisted that charcoal added flavor and we learned to love the subtle tones of fire.
• He had a rule about garage organization. It was called organized chaos. No one dared reorganize the chaos without permission.

What to avoid in a eulogy

• Do not turn the eulogy into a therapy session for the family. This is not the place to settle scores.
• Avoid sharing private family secrets that could hurt someone present.
• Do not read a long resume of accomplishments without stories that make them human.
• Avoid cliches unless you immediately give a specific detail that makes the line true.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Below are complete examples following the structure above. Replace bracketed text with your details and read them out loud to edit for your voice.

Example 1: Practical dad, 3 to 4 minute version

Hello. My name is Sam and I am David s son. My father was born in Cleveland and he worked as a mechanic for over thirty years. He could tell the exact trouble with a car by listening to the engine. He married my mother, Nina, and together they built a home where a bit of oil on the floor meant life was happening.

One small story that captures him is about his Saturday morning coffee. He would make a pot at dawn and sit on the back steps with a Bible and a crossword puzzle. If you woke him, he would offer you a cup and a life lesson in the same sentence. He taught us to show up, to keep your toolkit ready, and to apologize when you were wrong.

He volunteered at the school fixing lawnmowers. He loved a good practical joke and an honest conversation. We will miss his hands that fixed things and his patience that taught us to try again. Thank you for being here and for keeping his memory with us.

Example 2: Short modern eulogy under two minutes

Hi everyone. Im Jamie and I am Alex s daughter. Dad loved cheap cologne, old rock records, and terrible puns. He taught me to change a tire and to never pass up a slice of pizza. He made our house a place of music and loud laughter. Thank you for coming to celebrate him.

Example 3: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful

My name is Nora. My father, Maurice, was complicated in the best and hardest ways. We argued. We disagreed. In the last year we found small moments of understanding. He apologized once and I forgave him once. That felt like repair to me. He taught me to stop apologizing for being myself and to fight for what matters. I am grateful for that imperfect gift.

Example 4: Celebration of life tone with humor

Hello. I am Chris, his oldest child. If you met my father you know he had two life rules. Rule one be generous with sandwiches. Rule two never throw away a broken gadget because you might need the parts. Today we remember his sandwiches and his salvage yard spirit. Laugh with us as we tell the stories that made him ours.

Fill in the blank templates

Use these templates as a starting point. Fill in the blanks and then make the words yours.

Template A: Classic short

My name is [Your Name]. I am [father s name] [son daughter child]. [Father s name] was born in [place or year]. He loved [one hobby], he worked as [job], and he was the person we called when [small task or habit]. One memory that shows the kind of person he was is [brief story]. He taught me [value or lesson]. We will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for supporting our family.

Template B: For complicated relationships

My name is [Your Name]. My relationship with [father s name] was complicated. We argued about [small example]. Over time I came to appreciate [something positive]. In the last [months years] we [reconciled spoke often found peace]. If I could say one thing to him now it would be [short line you want to say].

Template C: Light and funny with sincerity

Hi. I am [Your Name]. To know [father s name] was to know that [quirky habit]. He also made sure we learned [life practical skill]. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. He made us laugh and he made us better at [practical skill]. I will miss his jokes and his exacting garage rituals. Thank you.

Practical tips for delivery

Speaking while grieving is hard. These pragmatic tips help keep you steady.

• Print your speech Use large font. Paper is reliable and less likely to behave unexpectedly than a phone.
• Use cue cards Index cards with a few lines on each are easy to handle and reduce the chance of losing your place.
• Mark pauses Put a bracket where you want to breathe or where the audience will laugh. Pauses give you time to collect yourself.
• Practice out loud Read the eulogy to a friend, to a mirror, or to your dog. This tells your throat what to expect.
• Bring tissues Or a handkerchief. If you stop, breathe, and continue. The audience will wait and they want you to be human in the room.
• Ask for help Arrange for a friend or relative to introduce you and to step in if you need them to finish a line.
• Mic technique Keep the microphone a few inches from your mouth and speak at a steady pace. If there is no mic, project to the back row and pace yourself.

When you are likely to cry while reading

If tears come, let them. Pause, breathe, and look down at your notes. Slow down your voice. Saying fewer words more slowly is often more powerful. If you cannot continue, have a designated person ready to pick up the last sentence. That option is both practical and kind.

How to include readings, poems, and music

Short readings work best. If you include a poem pick a two to four line excerpt rather than an entire long poem. Readings can be religious or secular. Always check with the officiant and print the text in the program if possible.

Music choices

• Pick songs your father loved or songs that fit the tone of the event.
• If live music is not possible ask the venue about playing a recorded track between speakers.
• Keep music brief and place it where it supports the speech for example before the eulogy or as a short interlude after a story.

Logistics and who to tell

• Tell the funeral director if you need a microphone or plan to hand out printed copies.
• Confirm with the officiant where you will stand and how long you may speak.
• Give a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service in case they need it for the program.

After the eulogy

People will often ask for a copy. Offer to email it to family and friends. Some families include the eulogy in the printed program or add it to a memory book. You can also record the audio and share it privately. That recording can be a comfort to people who were unable to attend.

Checklist before you step up to speak

• Confirm your time limit with family or officiant.
• Print your speech with large font and bring a backup copy.
• Practice at least three times out loud.
• Mark pauses and emotional beats in your copy.
• Bring tissues and a bottle of water if allowed.
• Tell a family member you might need a moment and arrange a small signal if you want them to finish a line if needed.

Recording and sharing the eulogy

Ask permission before posting a recording online. Some families prefer privacy. If sharing is approved add a brief note about where donations will go if contributions are being collected. Be thoughtful about who is comfortable with having the memory shared publicly.

Glossary of useful terms and acronyms

• Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
• Obituary A written notice that announces a death and usually includes service details.
• Order of service The plan for the funeral or memorial listing the sequence of events.
• Pallbearer Person chosen to carry the casket. They are usually family or close friends.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering that often focuses on stories and photos rather than rituals.
• Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing the end of life. Hospice care can take place at home or in a facility.
• RSVP Short for respond s il vous plait which means please respond. Used on invitations to request confirmation of attendance.

Frequently asked questions

How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous

Begin with your name and relationship to your father. A short opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I am [Father s Name] child gives the audience context and buys you a breath to settle. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It will steady you at the microphone.

What if I forget my place or start crying

Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you need a moment take it. People will wait. If you cannot continue ask a designated family member or friend to finish for you. Having a short note that someone else can pick up from helps in that scenario.

Should I include religious language if the family is not religious

Only if it was meaningful to your father or to the family. If religion was not central choose secular language that honors values and memories instead. You can include a brief reading or poem that matches the family s beliefs instead of prayer language.

How do I balance humor and respect

Use humor that is rooted in a real story that shows character. Avoid jokes that might embarrass or exclude listeners. Follow up a joke with a sincere line to reconnect the tone. Humor can open hearts but should not be used to deflect grief.

Can I read the eulogy from my phone

Yes you can but make sure the screen is bright enough in the venue and that the device will not ring. Many people prefer paper or printed index cards because they are easier to handle when emotions run high.

How long should a eulogy be

Three to seven minutes is a good target. Short speeches tend to be memorable. If multiple people are speaking coordinate times so the service stays on schedule.

Is it okay to record and share the eulogy online

Check with family before posting. Some families prefer privacy. If sharing is approved provide a short description and be mindful of the deceased s wishes.