How to Write a Eulogy for Your Chaplain - Eulogy Examples & Tips

How to Write a Eulogy for Your Chaplain - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Writing a eulogy for a chaplain can feel different from writing one for a family member or friend. Chaplains often served communities, hospitals, campuses, military units, or first responders. They may have been spiritual guides, counselors, or simply someone who showed up with a calm presence. This guide gives you a clear method, real examples, fill in the blank templates, and practical delivery tips so you can honor a chaplain with honesty and care.

We know how hard that can feel. You are sorting through precious memories, searching for the right words, and trying to hold it together when it is time to speak. It is a lot to carry.

That is why we created a simple step by step eulogy writing guide. It gently walks you through what to include, how to shape your thoughts, and how to feel more prepared when the moment comes. → Find Out More

Who this guide is for

This article is for anyone asked to speak about a chaplain at a funeral, memorial, celebration of life, or workplace remembrance. Maybe you are a colleague who worked alongside them, a patient or family member they supported, a service member who relied on them, or a friend who loved the way they listened. You do not need to be religious to give a meaningful tribute. There are sample scripts for formal religious services, secular memorials, short remarks, and longer tributes.

What is a chaplain and what did they do

A chaplain is a person who provides spiritual care, emotional support, and pastoral counseling in settings like hospitals, military units, prisons, schools, workplaces, and first responder teams. A chaplain can be ordained clergy or a trained spiritual care professional. They may represent a particular faith or serve people of many beliefs. Chaplaincy is the practice of meeting people where they are during some of the most intense moments of life.

Terms and acronyms you might see

  • Chaplaincy The field or practice of providing spiritual care and support in institutional settings.
  • Officiant The person leading a funeral or memorial service. This could be a clergy person, a funeral celebrant, or a family member.
  • Order of service The schedule for the memorial that lists readings, music, and speakers.
  • Hospice A care approach that prioritizes comfort and quality of life at the end of life. Hospice care can happen at home or in a facility.
  • VA Short for the Department of Veterans Affairs. This is relevant if the chaplain served in the military and military honors are being arranged.
  • Palliative care Medical care that focuses on relief from symptoms and stress of serious illness. Chaplains often work with palliative teams.
  • Interfaith An approach that respects and includes multiple religious or spiritual traditions.

How long should a eulogy for a chaplain be

Short and specific is usually better than long and diffuse. Aim for three to seven minutes for most services. That is roughly 400 to 800 spoken words. If you are representing an institution with many people speaking, coordinate time so the service stays on track. For a longer memorial where multiple colleagues speak, aim for five to ten minutes if you have a unique perspective or served closely with the chaplain.

Before you start writing

Take a breath and gather a few things first. Preparation trims anxiety and makes your tribute feel intentional.

  • Ask about time Confirm how long you are expected to speak and where you fit in the order of service.
  • Check tone Talk with family or the officiant. Should the tone be formal, spiritual, celebratory, or a mix?
  • Collect stories Reach out to coworkers, patients, service members, or congregants for one memory each. Small details matter more than big lists of roles.
  • Choose three focus points Pick three things you want listeners to remember. Examples are presence, practical acts of care, and a core value they held.

Structure that works

Use a simple structure to keep your words grounded and memorable.

  • Opening State your name and relationship to the chaplain. Offer one line that sets the tone.
  • Life sketch Give a brief overview of their chaplaincy roles and any personal information that matters to the story.
  • Anecdotes Tell one to three short stories that show who they were in practice. Show, do not just list.
  • Values or lessons Name the lessons or traits people will carry forward.
  • Closing Offer a farewell line, a short blessing, or a call for a moment of silence or reflection.

How to write the opening

The opening should be simple. Say your name, say how you knew the chaplain, and give a one sentence promise for the rest of your remarks. That last sentence can be gentle like Today I want to share how they showed up or Today I will tell two small stories that capture their care.

Opening examples

  • Good morning. I am Daniel. I served with Chaplain Miller for six years on the base and I want to share how they made the barracks feel like a safe place to talk.
  • Hello. I am Priya from the oncology unit. Chaplain Ortiz had a way of sitting in silence that said more than a thousand words. I want to tell you about two patient visits that show why.
  • My name is Kelly. I was a student and later a colleague of Chaplain Hassan. Today I will share how their curiosity and steady questions changed the way we listened to each other.

Writing the life sketch

The life sketch is not a full biography. Pick the facts that matter for the mood you are setting. Mention where they served, notable roles, and a human detail or two.

Life sketch templates

  • [Name] served as a chaplain at [place] for [number] years. They worked with [patients military personnel students first responders] and were known for [care trait]. They loved [hobby personal detail].
  • [Name] began chaplaincy after [life event]. They trained in [field or seminary] and spent their career offering presence to people at crossroads. At home they liked [small detail like gardening or coffee on the porch].

Anecdotes that show who they were

Stories are the heart of a eulogy. Choose short scenes with sensory detail and a small payoff. Avoid long clinical summaries of duties. Tell what their work looked like in human terms.

True story examples you can adapt

  • One night a family could not agree about care for their father. Chaplain Lee sat with each person separately and then asked them to describe one memory of love. That simple request shifted the room from argument to remembering and the family made a plan together.
  • After a difficult code blue, a nurse could not stop shaking. The chaplain did not offer a sermon. They made coffee, sat with the nurse, and said I am here if you want to talk. That quiet presence changed the night for that team.
  • On deployment the chaplain ran an evening chat with a mix of faiths. Someone brought their guitar and they all sang songs half known and half invented. The chaplain's laugh outlived the worry of the day.

Addressing faith and interfaith dynamics

Chaplaincies often span different beliefs. If the chaplain was religious, it is fine to include prayers or scripture, but keep the audience in mind. If the chaplain was known for interfaith care, honor that by using inclusive language or by including a short moment of silence instead of a prayer.

Examples for different settings

The Essential Guide to Writing a Eulogy

Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.

You will learn how to:

  • Gather memories with simple prompts.
  • Shape them into a clear structure.
  • Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.

What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.

Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.

  • For a faith based service you can include a short scripture or prayer that the chaplain favored. Keep it to a few lines so it does not become a long liturgical reading unless that is expected.
  • For an interfaith or secular memorial a personal reflection, a poem excerpt, or a moment of silence can honor both the chaplain and the diversity of the room.
  • When in doubt, ask the family or the officiant about what feels appropriate.

How to include humor

Humor is welcome when it is gentle and earned. Chaplains often had funny quirks. A one line anecdote that shows warmth is better than a punch line that might miss the room.

Safe humor examples

  • Chaplain Reed had a universal coffee mug that read Ask Me About My Cat. No one knew if they actually had a cat. We are still not sure, but the mug started every conversation.
  • They never left a meeting without saying Remember to breathe. We joked that if you could not breathe you could borrow their used yoga mat.

What to avoid

  • Avoid long lists of positions without stories. People connect with moments not titles.
  • Avoid confidential patient or unit details that break privacy. Use general descriptions instead.
  • Avoid settling disputes or airing grudges. Public memorials are not the place for family arguments.
  • Avoid theological debates unless that was the explicit tone requested by the family.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Example 1: Hospital chaplain, 3 to 4 minute version

Hello. I am Rachel. I am a nurse on the 4th floor and I worked with Chaplain Alvarez for five years. Chaplain Alvarez had a way of knowing when silence was the gift a family needed. They would sit without trying to fix anything and that presence became its own kind of care.

One memory shows this clearly. A family was arguing about whether to continue treatment for their mother. Emotions were raw and words were sharp. The chaplain asked each person to tell one thing their mother loved. Suddenly the room was full of pancakes and Thursday baseball games and a laugh that everyone shared. The argument softened and the family was able to make a decision together.

They taught us that spiritual care looks like small actions. A priest could never have done the work of being there the way they did. We will miss their steady hands, their unexpected jokes, and the way they made a busy floor feel slightly more humane. Thank you for showing up for us and for so many others.

Example 2: Military chaplain, short and formal

Good afternoon. I am Captain Marcus Brown. Chaplain Thompson served with our unit overseas and at home base for eight years. They embodied service by fostering resilience and by creating space to talk about the things that felt unsayable.

I remember a night patrol debrief where someone finally opened up about fear. Chaplain Thompson listened without judgment and then taught us a short breathing exercise that we used for months after. That exercise saved more than one night shift. Their leadership on and off duty made our platoon safer. We owe them a deep debt of gratitude.

Example 3: Campus chaplain, light and personal

Hello. I am Maya and I worked with Chaplain Singh at the student center. They had a ridiculous collection of novelty socks and a love of chai that matched their comfort with a difficult conversation. They would show up to finals week with tea and a listening ear and a joke about the tenure process.

Their work was small and huge at the same time. They organized quiet rooms during exam week, held late night vigils after losses, and remembered birthdays when no one else did. Their presence made the campus feel like a real community. Thank you for being our safe person.

Example 4: Complicated relationship, honest and respectful

My name is Sam. I did not always agree with Chaplain Peters and we had long debates about theology and policy. Those conversations were sometimes heated. In time I came to respect how deeply they cared about people who were suffering and how stubbornly they believed presence mattered more than answers.

The Essential Guide to Writing a Eulogy

Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.

You will learn how to:

  • Gather memories with simple prompts.
  • Shape them into a clear structure.
  • Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.

What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.

Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.

In their last months they apologized for the ways they had been distant and asked if I would forgive them for being too busy. That short conversation felt like a gift. I learned from them how to hold conviction and humility in the same hand. I am grateful for that lesson.

Fill in the blank templates

Use these templates as a base. Replace bracketed text and add details that make the lines true for the chaplain you are honoring.

Template A: Short and professional

My name is [Your Name]. I worked with Chaplain [Last Name] at [place]. They served our community by [one sentence about care they provided]. One story that shows who they were is [brief anecdote]. We will remember their [trait values]. Thank you for supporting their family and for remembering how they served us.

Template B: Faith oriented

Hello. I am [Your Name]. Chaplain [Last Name] led with a deep faith in [tradition if relevant]. They often quoted [short scripture or line] and lived it out through [practical detail]. A moment that captures them is [brief story]. We will carry forward their habit of [value]. Let us take a moment to reflect or pray in whatever way feels right.

Template C: Interfaith or secular

Hi. I am [Your Name]. Chaplain [Last Name] was someone who listened better than most of us. They met people of every belief with respect and curiosity. My favorite memory is [short story]. They taught me to pause and to ask How are you really doing. I am grateful for their example.

Practical tips for delivery

  • Print your speech Use large text and bring a backup copy. Paper feels steadier than a phone in emotional moments.
  • Use cue cards Small index cards with one or two lines on each help you stay oriented and keep your eyes off a long page.
  • Mark pauses Indicate where to breathe, where the audience will laugh, and where you expect a quiet moment.
  • Practice out loud Read your words to a friend, to a mirror, or while walking. Practice tells your throat what to expect.
  • Bring water and tissues Hydrating and pausing work miracles. If you need a moment, take it. The audience will give it.
  • Coordinate with the officiant Tell them if you will include a prayer, a poem, or a music cue. They will help keep the service smooth.
  • If military honors are expected Contact the funeral director and the chaplaincy office or the VA coordinator early. Military honors require planning and may affect timing.

What to do if you start crying

Tears are normal and often welcome. Pause, take a breath, sip water, and continue slowly. If you cannot continue, have a trusted person lined up to say a sentence or two and then hand the moment back to you if you are able to finish. Many audiences will prefer an honest pause over an attempt to rush through.

Including prayers, readings, and music

If you include a prayer, keep it brief unless a long liturgy is expected. For secular audiences consider a short poem or a reflective reading. Music can be played before or after your remarks or used as a brief interlude. Confirm timing with the officiant and provide printed text if needed.

Logistics to check

  • Confirm your speaking time with the family or service organizer.
  • Ask the funeral director about microphone setup and where to stand.
  • If the chaplain served with an organization, check whether colleagues or leadership want to participate or if there are official protocols.
  • Provide a printed copy of your remarks to the person running the service in case it needs to be included in the program or memory book.

After the eulogy

People will likely come up to you. You do not have to have answers. A simple I am glad you are here or Thank you for sharing that memory is enough. Some families request copies of the eulogy for the program or a memorial website. Offer to email it if people ask. If a recording is made, ask permission before sharing it publicly.

Glossary of useful terms

  • Chaplain A person who provides spiritual and emotional care in institutional settings like hospitals, military units, campuses, and prisons.
  • Officiant The person leading the service. This might be clergy, a funeral celebrant, or a family member.
  • Order of service The plan for the memorial listing speakers, readings, and music.
  • Hospice Care focused on comfort and quality of life at the end of life. Chaplains frequently partner with hospice teams.
  • VA Refers to the Department of Veterans Affairs. Relevant for military chaplains and for arranging honors.
  • Palliative care Medical care that eases symptoms and stress of serious illness, often working alongside chaplaincy.

Frequently asked questions

How do I start a eulogy for a chaplain if I am nervous

Start with your name and your relationship to the chaplain. A simple line like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I was a colleague of Chaplain [Last Name] helps you breathe and gives listeners context. Practice that opening a few times so it feels steady when you speak.

Do I need to use the chaplain s religious language

Only if it fits the chaplain and the family s wishes. If the chaplain was interfaith or served many beliefs, choose inclusive language or a brief reflective reading. When in doubt ask the family or the officiant.

What if I do not know many personal details

It is fine to speak from your perspective. Share how they helped you or your team, describe a memorable interaction, and speak to the chaplain s character. Small honest observations are more meaningful than filling time with facts you do not know.

Can I include a prayer or scripture

Yes if it is appropriate for the family and the audience. Keep prayers short and consider offering the option of a moment of silence for those with different beliefs.

How do I handle military protocol if the chaplain served in the armed forces

Coordinate with the funeral director and the unit s leadership or the VA office. Military honors and flag details require planning. Ask early so honors can be arranged without last minute stress.

Should I share the eulogy with the family before the service

It is a good idea to offer the family a copy. They may want to suggest edits, especially if there are privacy concerns or if sensitive details are included. Sending a copy also helps the person running the service add the text to a program or memorial book.


The Essential Guide to Writing a Eulogy

Being asked to give a eulogy is an honour, but it can feel daunting when you are grieving. This guide offers a calm, step by step process so you are not starting from a blank page alone.

You will learn how to:

  • Gather memories with simple prompts.
  • Shape them into a clear structure.
  • Choose wording that sounds like you when read aloud.

What is inside: short outlines, prompts, example eulogies and delivery tips to support you from first notes to final reading.

Perfect for: family, friends and colleagues who want to honour a loved one with sincere, manageable words.

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About Jeffery Isleworth

Jeffery Isleworth is an experienced eulogy and funeral speech writer who has dedicated his career to helping people honor their loved ones in a meaningful way. With a background in writing and public speaking, Jeffery has a keen eye for detail and a talent for crafting heartfelt and authentic tributes that capture the essence of a person's life. Jeffery's passion for writing eulogies and funeral speeches stems from his belief that everyone deserves to be remembered with dignity and respect. He understands that this can be a challenging time for families and friends, and he strives to make the process as smooth and stress-free as possible. Over the years, Jeffery has helped countless families create beautiful and memorable eulogies and funeral speeches. His clients appreciate his warm and empathetic approach, as well as his ability to capture the essence of their loved one's personality and life story. When he's not writing eulogies and funeral speeches, Jeffery enjoys spending time with his family, reading, and traveling. He believes that life is precious and should be celebrated, and he feels honored to help families do just that through his writing.