How to Write a Eulogy for Your Best Friend - Eulogy Examples & Tips

Writing a eulogy for your best friend feels both impossible and necessary. You want to honor the person who knew you at your worst and your best. You also want to get through speaking in front of people who loved them too. This guide gives a clear plan, real examples, and fill in the blank templates you can adapt. We explain terms so nothing feels like insider jargon and we give tips for delivery that actually work when you are emotional.

Who this guide is for

This article is for anyone asked to speak about a best friend at a funeral, memorial, graveside service, or celebration of life. Maybe you were the person they texted at midnight. Maybe you were their roommate in college. Maybe you grew apart but the friendship mattered. There are examples for short tributes, longer memories, funny tones, and complicated relationships.

What is a eulogy for a best friend

A eulogy is a short speech that honors someone who has died. When the subject is your best friend the goal is to share the person you loved in ways that make sense to people who may not have known them as well. A eulogy is a collection of stories, a few facts, and a feeling. It is not a full life story or a place to resolve every conflict. It is one honest and meaningful tribute.

Terms you might see and what they mean

• Obituary A written notice announcing a death with basic facts like birth date, survivors, and service details.
• Order of service The schedule for the funeral or memorial. It lists readings, music, and speakers.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering that focuses on stories and photos rather than rituals.
• Pallbearer Someone chosen to help carry a casket. They are often close friends or family.
• Program Printed sheet with the order of service, readings, and acknowledgments.
• Hospice Care focused on comfort for people nearing the end of life. Hospice can be at home or in a facility.
• RSVP Short for the French phrase respond s il vous plait which means please respond. It is used on invitations to confirm attendance.

How long should a eulogy be

Short and focused generally works best. Aim for three to seven minutes. That usually translates to about 400 to 800 spoken words. If other people are speaking coordinate so the total service stays on time. A short heartfelt speech is often more memorable than a long ramble.

Before you start writing

Take a quick planning step before you open a blank document. This keeps your writing honest and helps you pick the right tone.

• Ask about time Confirm how long you are expected to speak and where your eulogy fits in the order of service.
• Decide the tone Do you want solemn, funny, messy, or a mix? A best friend eulogy can be playful and serious in the same minute. Check with family if you are unsure.
• Gather memories Jot down the first five memories that come to mind. Ask mutual friends for one memory each. Small sensory details are gold like smells, songs, foods, or a phrase your friend used.
• Pick three focus points Choose three short things you want people to remember about your friend. Three gives shape and keeps the speech from wandering.

Structure that works

Use this simple shape. It keeps you grounded and gives listeners something easy to follow.

• Opening Say your name and how you knew the person. That gives the audience context.
• Life sketch Offer a brief overview of who they were. This is not a full bio. Think in roles like friend, coworker, partner, volunteer, band member, pet parent.
• Anecdotes Tell one to three short stories that reveal character. Keep them specific and sensory.
• Lessons and traits Summarize what they taught you or what people will miss.
• Closing Offer a final line, a quote, or an invitation for people to share a memory after the service.

How to write the opening

Start simple. Your opening gives you a moment to settle. Say your name, your relationship, and one sentence that sets a tone.

Opening examples

• Hi everyone. I am Jamie and I was Alex s roommate for nine years. Alex taught me how to make the perfect grilled cheese and how to forgive myself for small mistakes.
• Hello. I m Priya and Sam was my oldest and loudest friend. Sam made introducing people to each other feel like arranging a surprise party.
• Good afternoon. I m Marcus and I got to call Riley my best friend since middle school. Riley kept a mixtape folder on every phone like a digital security blanket.

How to write the life sketch

Keep the life sketch short and human. Focus on roles and small facts that matter for the story you are telling.

Life sketch templates

• [Name] grew up in [place] and loved [hobby or interest]. They worked as [job or role] and spent spare time doing [hobby]. They were a friend who would [small habit].
• [Name] moved to [city] when they were [age or life stage]. They were known for [distinctive trait] and for [one memorable habit].

Anecdotes that show who they were

People remember stories more than facts. Pick one or two short stories that show why your friend mattered. Keep them sensory and end with why the story matters.

Good anecdote structure

• Setup Where were you and why does this memory matter.
• Action What happened. Keep it short.
• Payoff One sentence about what this reveals about your friend.

Anecdote examples

• When we lost power during a heat wave, they turned my tiny apartment into a dance floor with fairy lights and a portable speaker. It was a small rescue mission that showed how they refused to let hopelessness win.
• On road trips they made a playlist that started with sad songs and ended with cheesy pop so we could cry and then laugh. That playlist is a good summary of how they held space for both feelings at once.
• They always ordered for the table. If you were quiet about what you wanted they would pick your meal like they knew what you needed. That was their way of caring.

When the relationship was complicated

Not every best friend relationship is easy. You can be honest without being hurtful. Acknowledge the complexity and focus on something real you learned or a moment of reconciliation if there was one.

Examples for complicated relationships

• We had seasons where we were not close. We argued and then found our way back. I learned how to apologize and how to be forgiven.
• They could be selfish sometimes and that hurt. They were also the person who showed up when it mattered most. I remember both things and I am grateful for the second.
• We grew up and grew apart in places. In the last two years we texted more than we had in a decade and those messages felt like a gift.

Using humor and raw honesty together

Humor can make a room breathe. Best friend eulogies often land well when small funny moments are paired with something sincere. Avoid anything that would embarrass the person in a way family would not appreciate.

Safe humor examples

• They treated plants like roommates and most of the plants were better behaved than their actual roommates.
• If you ever needed a cover story for sneaking out of a boring event they had a ten step plan that somehow always involved tacos.

What to avoid in a eulogy

• Avoid using the eulogy as a place to settle old arguments publicly.
• Avoid giving long catalogues of achievements without stories that make them human.
• Avoid jokes that single out or shame people who will be present.
• Avoid trying to tell the entire life story. A eulogy is a snapshot from your view.

Full eulogy examples you can adapt

Below are complete examples you can personalize. Replace bracketed text and tweak details so they sound like you.

Example 1: Short and sweet two to three minute tribute

Hi. I m Tara and I was J s best friend for twenty years. J was the person who would call at midnight and bring cereal for dinner because they believed hunger and laughter fixed most problems. They had a laugh that made strangers smile and a stubborn kindness that showed up whenever someone needed it. One small memory that captures J is when they rescued a stray dog and then taught it to sit on command by bribing it with french fries. That is J in a sentence stubborn and soft. We will miss their laugh and their way of making ordinary nights feel like home. Thank you for being here and for loving J the way they deserved.

Example 2: Funny and honest four to five minute tribute

Hello everyone. I am Ben and if you ever wondered who was responsible for teaching Sam every terrible dad joke in the region the answer is me and I confess it with shame. Sam loved bad jokes and great music and insisted that guacamole was not optional. There was a night in college when the power went out and Sam led an impromptu acoustic concert with a ukulele we know none of them could play. We still talk about that night because it was messy and magical at once. Sam taught us to lean into the small joy and to help your friends move without charging them pizza money. I will miss the texts that just read where are you and the voice mails that started with a weird impression. I will miss them more than I expected. Please raise a hand if you have a quick story to share after this so we can keep remembering in pieces.

Example 3: Complicated friendship with reconciliation

My name is Leila. Me and Marco had a friendship that survived break ups, moving cities, and a two year period of radio silence. We made mistakes. We also came back together a few years ago and had the hardest honest conversations we had ever had. Marco taught me that saying sorry is a muscle you can build and that forgiveness sometimes looks like showing up again. In Marco s last months we read old messages and laughed until we cried. That felt like a full circle I did not know we would get. I am grateful for the second acts we gave each other.

Fill in the blank templates you can use

Use these templates as a starting point. Replace bracketed text and then read it out loud. Cut anything that feels forced.

Template A: Classic short friend tribute

Hi I m [Your Name]. I was [Friend s Name] best friend for [time span]. [Friend s Name] loved [one hobby or thing they loved]. One memory that shows who they were is [brief story]. That story shows [trait or lesson]. I will miss [what people will miss]. Thank you for being here and for holding [Friend s Name] memory with us.

Template B: Funny but sincere

Hey everyone. I m [Your Name]. To know [Friend s Name] was to know that [quirky habit]. They also had practical skills like [useful skill]. My favorite memory is [funny small story]. Even when they were ridiculous they were always kind. I will miss their [funny trait] and their fierce loyalty. Please laugh with us today as we remember them.

Template C: For complicated relationships

I m [Your Name]. My relationship with [Friend s Name] was complicated. We argued, we drifted, and sometimes we hurt each other. In the end we found our way back and I learned [lesson]. If I could say one thing to them now I would say [short line you want to say].

Practical tips for delivery

Speaking while grieving is hard. These are simple practical moves that help you get through the moment.

• Print your speech Use a large font. Paper is easier to handle than a phone when emotions are high.
• Use cue cards Small index cards with a few lines on each card reduce the chance of losing your place.
• Mark pauses Put a mark where you want to breathe or where you expect laughter. Pauses give you time to regroup.
• Practice out loud Read it to a friend or to a mirror. Practice steadies the voice.
• Bring tissues and water Keep them nearby. A sip of water is a surprisingly effective reset tool.
• Ask for backup Tell a friend you might need a moment and ask if they will be ready to step in and finish a line if needed.
• Mic technique If there is a microphone keep it a few inches from your mouth and speak at a normal volume. If there is no mic speak slowly and project to the back row.

What to do if you cry or lose your place

If tears come that is okay. Pause, breathe, look at your notes, and then continue. If your voice breaks slow down. The room will wait. If you cannot continue ask the friend you prepared to step in. Many people end up delivering a shorter tribute than they planned and that is fine. Saying fewer words slowly often carries more meaning.

Including readings music and photos

Short is better when you include other elements. A one or two line poem excerpt can be powerful. If you want to play a song pick one that mattered to your friend and keep it brief. If you include photos consider a small slideshow that runs during an interlude rather than interrupting your speech.

Logistics to confirm

• Confirm your time limit with the family or the officiant.
• Ask if there is a microphone and where you will stand.
• Provide a copy of your speech to the person running the order of service if they request it.
• Ask about recording rules. Some families want a recording for people who could not attend.

After the eulogy

People may ask for a copy. Offer to email it. Family and friends often collect short writings for a memory book. You might be asked to share a recording privately. If you are comfortable consider sharing the text with close people so memories stay alive in small ways.

Checklist before you step up to speak

• Confirm your time limit and place in the order of service.
• Print your speech with large font and bring a backup copy.
• Practice out loud at least three times.
• Mark emotional beats and pauses in your copy.
• Bring tissues and a glass of water if allowed.
• Arrange a backup person to finish a line if needed.

Glossary of useful terms and acronyms

• Eulogy A speech given at a funeral or memorial to honor the person who has died.
• Obituary A written notice about a death that includes basic facts and service details.
• Order of service The plan for the funeral listing the sequence of events.
• Pallbearer A person chosen to help carry the casket. Often family or close friends.
• Celebration of life A less formal gathering focused on stories and photos rather than rituals.
• Hospice Care that focuses on comfort and quality of life for someone nearing end of life. It can be provided at home or in a facility.
• RSVP An abbreviation asking guests to confirm attendance. It stands for respond s il vous plait which means please respond in French.

Frequently asked questions

How do I start a eulogy if I am nervous

Begin with your name and your relationship to the person. A short opening like Hello my name is [Your Name] and I was [Friend s Name] best friend gives the audience context and buys you a moment to breathe. Practice that opening until it feels familiar. It will steady you at the microphone.

How do I decide what stories to tell

Pick three memories that show different sides of your friend like funny small moments, a time they showed kindness, and a moment that reveals what they valued. Keep each story short and end with one line about why it matters.

Can I include humor in a eulogy for a best friend

Yes. Humor often feels natural in a best friend tribute. Use jokes that are kind and earned. Follow a joke with a sincere line so the tone stays grounded.

What if our friendship had problems

You can be honest without being hurtful. Acknowledge complexity and focus on what you learned or a moment of reconciliation. Keep private grievances out of a public eulogy.

Should I read from my phone

Paper is usually easier when emotions run high but you can use a phone if the screen is bright and in airplane mode. Make sure the device will not ring and that you are comfortable with the touch screen when your hands might shake.

How long should I speak

Aim for three to seven minutes. Short tributes are often more powerful. Coordinate with other speakers so the service stays on schedule.

Do I need permission to share inside jokes or private memories

Consider whether a memory will upset family members or embarrass anyone. If it is private but meaningful think about sharing it in smaller gatherings rather than at the main service.

What do I do if I cry and cannot continue

Pause, breathe, and look at your notes. If you cannot continue have a friend ready to step in and finish a line. Most people understand and will wait. Your humanity is part of the tribute.