Eulogies are often the most difficult speeches to write, as they bring a mix of emotions and a sense of responsibility to do justice to the memory of the deceased. One common question that arises during the eulogy-writing process is whether or not to include how the person died in the speech. In this article, we will discuss when and how to mention the cause of death, if at all, in a eulogy, as well as provide an example to help illustrate the points.
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Consider the Audience and the Family’s Wishes
Before deciding to include the cause of death in a eulogy, it’s essential to consider the audience and the family’s wishes. If the family has specifically requested that the cause of death be left out or wishes it to be shared, it’s crucial to respect their preference. The family may be trying to protect young ones or feel that the focus should be on the deceased’s life, rather than their death.
Focus on the Person’s Life
A eulogy’s primary purpose is to celebrate and honour the deceased’s life, sharing cherished memories, their accomplishments and the positive impact they had on others. Including the cause of death might shift the focus from the life led to the circumstances surrounding their passing. If you do choose to mention the cause of death, ensure that it is done in a manner that does not overshadow the other heartfelt and positive aspects of your speech.
Use Discretion when Discussing Sensitive Topics
Certain circumstances surrounding the death, such as suicide or drug overdose, may be particularly delicate and difficult for the audience to hear. In these situations, it may be better to focus on the deceased’s life and the love and support of their family and friends, rather than delving into the specific details of their passing. If you do decide to discuss the cause of death, approach it with sensitivity and emphasise the importance of remembering the person for who they were and not solely by their manner of passing.
Balance Honesty and Tact
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If you believe it’s essential to mention the cause of death while remaining respectful, try to find a balance between honesty and tact. Acknowledge the circumstances without dwelling on them and remain sensitive to the feelings of the audience. This may involve using appropriate language and focusing on the strengths, resilience, or courage shown by the deceased in facing their final days.
Providing a Sense of Comfort and Understanding
In specific instances, sharing the cause of death may provide comfort and understanding for some attendees. It may also be a way to raise awareness of a particular illness, disability, or social issue to inspire change or action in honour of the deceased.
Do You Include How A Person Dies In A Eulogy Example:
Let’s consider John, who passed away after a long battle with cancer. His family decides to mention his cause of death in the eulogy but wants it done in a way that does not overshadow his life. A fitting way to approach this could be:
“John faced his battle with cancer with courage and determination, refusing to let it define him. Throughout his treatment, he continued to pursue his passions and support those he loved, making the most of every day. In honour of John, we celebrate his incredible zest for life, the memories he left behind, and the impact he had on those around him.”
In this example, the cause of death is mentioned but framed in a way that highlights John’s strength and spirit, rather than focusing solely on the illness itself.
Deciding whether or not to include the cause of death in a eulogy can be a challenging decision. Take the time to think about the audience, your loved one’s wishes, and the focus of the eulogy. Always approach sensitive topics with tact and empathy, ensuring those in attendance leave feeling comforted and inspired by the life of the deceased. With insights from this article, we hope you find the right way to honour your loved one’s memory in a meaningful and compassionate way.
If you’ve found this article helpful, please consider sharing it with others who may be faced with a similar question or explore our other guides on Eulogy Assistant. Our goal is to support you through the eulogy-writing process and help you honour your loved one with a heartfelt, memorable speech.